Unexplored Territory

Sunday, December 31, 2006

Happy One!

Hard to believe that we are putting to rest 2006. So many things happened this year.

Here's to another prosperous and fun-filled year.

Happy New Year, everyone!

Winding down the weekend/ramblings

Well it has been a flurry of activity here as usual. Worked yesterday morning to finish up for the week, ran to the grocery, came home and cooked up our "Christmas" dinner with the inlaws, ran to Hobby Lobby, dropped a few bucks, and then went to friend Robin's.

To Julie, Christie, Robin, and Wendy ... thank you for forgiving all time. Even if I haven't seen some of you for months, it is like it was yesterday that we saw one another. And there are no expectations (well, other than showing up, of course!). I am so happy to have you all in my life. Now I am going to start calling you. Every day. Five times a day. ;)

Trying to decide what I want to do today. I need to knit an order. I want to keep the momentum of scrapping going. I will probably go with the latter.

And speaking of latter ... when you have three or more choices, don't you say "latter of the X"?

So I say:

We could (1) go to the movie, (2) stay home, or (3) go to the grocery ... do you say latter of the three? Because with former and latter, isn't the implication that there are only two choices? So do you say "latter of the three"?

Burning question, I know. But one that Ace and I had the other day when I presented three options to him, and he said the latter and I said "which one?"

Poor Ace. He has even admitted that he doesn't like to argue with me because he can never win. I told him it wasn't fair to compare himself to me, and that he should keep on trying. That is like comparing a person who rarely rides a horse to a jockey.

And then we are sitting in church, and Mini Martha decided to come, which made me happy. But she is sitting there, TEXTING her daughter. Like three times. There was one point in time when Queen (who decided to bypass her first church and sit with us, and YAWN all the way through service) even pointed at Mini Martha, and I said "I know .. she doesn't know better, does she?"

I will give her the benefit of the doubt the first time ... her daughter/my niece is due in a few weeks, so she wants to be at her beck and call. But after the first text, if it doesn't include the phrase "gng 2 hsptl; mt me thr" then you probably should put the phone away and call her after church is over.

But that wasn't the point of me bringing up the subject of church. Our pastor asked us if we knew what a blog was, and my MIL is sitting right there. You see, the Queen knows about this blog, and I was afraid that she would open her mouth and say "My Mommy has one that my Grammy doesn't know about!" right there in the middle of church. But she didn't, thank goodness. Because I am not ready for that reckoning quite yet.

And speaking of the inlaws, they are coming over here in a bit, so I should end this little post.

Saturday, December 30, 2006

Do you know me?

I have been tagged by Local Girl at An Island Life to tell you five things that you don't know about me. Being a person who wears everything on her sleeve, it might be a little difficult to come up with something... but here goes!

I have a debilitating fear of spiders. Yes, arachnophobia. I hate them. They give me the creeps, and I am always afraid that they are hanging over my head.
In 1989, I was crowned a local beauty queen. Proud moment there.
My hip was dislocated at birth, and now I face imminent hip replacement surgery.
I knew I would have three children.
Although I went to law school, I never wanted to be an attorney. And I still don't.

So there you go ... some very interesting pieces of information about me. And now I tag Robin, the Mind, Kelly, and Maggie! Have fun, ladies!

I love carrots

The morning started off with a bang when I heard the girls' door close at 6:12. Queen decided that it was high time to awaken, so she took her sister with her on the trip. So I had two people up at the crack-arse of dawn to keep in their rooms and finish a case dealing with the return of certain seized property that was seized by the government during an investigation into the steroid use of at least 10 professional baseball players. Exciting times right there at 6:20 in the am.

And then the news of Saddam's execution.... mind you, I am no Saddam-lover. I do not condone the actions that occurred. However ... I just can't explain it.

However, all of this flurried activity allowed me to get a jump start on the work that I was unable to finish last night because you see...

We have been invaded by the inlaws.

Yes. It is "Christmas weekend" here at our house. That means I get to go shopping this morning, come home, and cook a meal for lunchtime.

But there is a carrot dangling in front of me to spur me on...

A night of 'booking it with the babes! I cannot wait to see the group of crazies tonight and have some good times!

So it WILL be a good day ... once I get through the rest of it.

Friday, December 29, 2006

ob·ses·sion - noun - 1. the domination of one's thoughts or feelings by a persistent idea, image, desire, etc.

I thought that no other child of mine could rival the Door Man's obsessions with things. Doors, paper, notebooks, and cars have all been obsessed over by the Man since he was able to walk. Doors started it all off. Open. Shut. Open. Shut. Open. Shut. We never had to worry that he was trying to get to the other side of the door. It was just his fun. I started to worry that maybe it was a sign of autism, but that fear dispelled itself over time.

Then it moved over to the Handy Dandy Notebook. It didn't have to look like Steve's notebook from Blue's Clues, though. It could be anything ... a homemade one or a hand-held flip notebook would suffice. I could take him to the grocery store with me, and he would have his list and walk beside me, and he could have the best time.

Now we have moved on to paper. Any paper. But he just writes one thing on it. Days of the week, months of the year, the years, you name it. It goes along with an obsession with calendars. While he could entertain himself with these things for hours, he is very particular about a lot of things.

So I really didn't think that I could meet a more uptight individual with a different obsession.

Until the Monkey started with her lip gloss obsession.

It started off innocently enough but it has grown to such epic proportion now that it is difficult to placate her when the lip gloss is ripped from her tiny hands.

We didn't get any lip gloss for her for Christmas because her lip gloss obsession precedes her, and we knew that someone in our family would feed the fixation. And sure enough, the Mominator came through with TWO lip gloss selections, one of which is a bright purple color and that glossy crap.

Now, I can handle her having something that is GOOD for her lips, like Chap Stick or a menthol-treated lip balm, but this stuff... it is sticky and it has appeared on sleeves and shirts.

When everyone else was opening their presents after the hurricane known as my children had whipped through theirs, the Monkey tripped over one of the rugs in my parents house. She fell, hit her chin, and immediately started crying. Daddy was right there to pick her up, and I knew what was going to come out of her mouth next...

I hurt my chin..... I need some lip gloss.

Because you know ... lip gloss fixes everything.

Thursday, December 28, 2006

Baby Jane says...

If you don't listen to my Mommy and go to Kelly's blog at Pass the Torch to comment once a day to raise money for St. Jude Children's Research Hospital, I'll come to your house and cry.

Don't make me do it!

Wednesday, December 27, 2006

TT # 23

I borrowed this idea from my friend, Robin. She had a TT13 dedicated to her past jobs, and I thought it was pretty cool... so here is my list of...

Thirteen Jobs I Have Had

1. A Kroger bagger. It wasn't too bad of a job, but during the winter, man... it kicked my butt. I remember my mother making me get all dressed up in my Dad's Carhartts. It was embarassing.

2. A local ice cream joint employee. For one month. The Jolly Dipper, to be exact. I remember making my ex-boyfriend a milkshake, and him asking if there were pieces of coconut in the shake. It wasn't coconut. It was pieces of the styrofoam that I had chewed off of the cup when I had it on the machine (and that ex was Bob, Robin).

3. A ticket taker at a movie theater. For one day. Ace started a job at a theater when we were in college, and I wanted to spend as much time as I could with him so I decided to go for a job there. I hated it. HATED it. Did I mention that I hated it?

4. A ticket giver/event manager at our university's box office. LOVED this job. Absolutely loved it. Worked different events, sold the tickets, took care of front of house stuff. Just loved it.

5. A group sales ticket pusher at Cedar Point. This has and always will be my most favorite job of all time. I absolutely adored this job because I could go from college to this job, back to college, back to the job, and never, ever have to see my mother. Not. One. Single. Time. It was a glorious time for me, especially the summer that Ace worked there, too. Oh ... such glory days.

6. A research assistant for a tax professor. Ok. I did it for the carrel. I didn't want to be his research assistant, but he had a kick-ass carrel assigned for his assistant. So when he asked, I took it. I did absolutely NOTHING and he didn't care. It was a sweet setup.

7. A server at Friendlys. This was my longest server gig. I worked there in college and in law school. It was ok; we loved the instant money of it, but Ace HATED the way I smelled when I came home from work.

8. A server at Bob Evans. For one week. Yeah. Didn't care for that.

9. Administrator of the dispute resolution program at a Better Business Bureau. I really liked this job because I met a lot of cool people there. I didn't care for my boss, but I liked the Vice President ok. I worked there to the very last day before the Queen was born.

10. A server at the Olive Garden. Actually, I had this gig when I first graduated from law school and before I got the job in # 9. It was ok. I liked the eating part.

11. A Customer Service Manager at a Wally World Supercenter. Believe it or not, I really enjoyed this job. AND i was named their VERY first Employee of the Month! Hooo-ah! A law school grad working at Wal Mart. Hey ... I ain't too proud.

12. A Case Law Editor. It's an ok deal; I've had the chance to raise the kids and I appreciate having that opportunity.

13. Mother. I consider this the HARDEST job of all, and one that should be highly paid.

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The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

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My new roommate

Scooter McGavin, a fellow Ohioan, has joined me for the week as my renter.

He is running a little contest, but it ends today so get over to his blog to read all about it.

And he has an awesome list of 50 albums that he has reviewed! I know I could use that because I am really not music-inclined anymore. I couldn't tell you the name of one new group out there.

However, I could tell you that one of the Wiggles is leaving.

So if you want better information than that, check out Scooter's blog!

Kudos to Ace

Ace had an appointment this morning to have his blood drawn to follow-up on a high cholesterol reading.

First, kudos to Ace for voluntarily making the appointment. That is one less thing his mother will hound me about this weekend.

Second, kudos to Ace for not passing out.

Because he does do that. The last time he had his blood drawn, he passed out in the chair.

When I had my epidural for the Man and they couldn't find the right "spot" for it, I kept jumping when they would hit those "electric shock" nerves. I looked up and Ace was whiter than a sheet. I told him to sit down immediately, and asked the nurse to tend to him because of his inability to handle the sight of needles. I knew that the nurse understood, so she quickly took care of him. Of course, I was sitting there, hunched up over my pillow and the anesthesiologist is poking around MY back and making ME uncomfortable, and all I could think of was how my husband couldn't handle it.

This of course strengthened my belief that, if left to the male species to populate this earth, we would be an extinct species.

So poor Ace's reputation precedes him wherever he goes. And he will never be able to live it down, I don't think.

But he has overcome. He has persevered.

And I will look like the wife who made him do it, which will earn me points in his mother's book. But I will have to dispel that untruth, letting her know that he did it all on his own accord.

But it just dawned on me ... she won't give me the benefit of the doubt .. she will immediately think her son did it.

So kudos to you, Ace.

Tuesday, December 26, 2006

And you can take THAT to the bank

Remember that article that I talked about ... the one with our town's humorous docket entries? Yeah... I'm lazy to look it up and link it, so sorry.

Well, this one was in today's newspaper, and it is a BEAUT!

A local man reported Friday that he sent $500 to a woman he met on Horny.com. The woman claimed to be living in Nigeria visiting her sick mother. The man said that after he sent the money, the woman's tone changed from sexy to "Hey, I just got $500," according to the police report. The man said he only sent the woman money because he thought he had a chance to be with a sexy 25-year-old. Deputies did not pursue the case because the woman lives in Nigeria.

Let's break out those MLK decorations!

The day after Christmas has always been a downer for me, and now that I am an adult who is responsible for the happiness and well-being of three minor children, it REALLY is a downer when the day is over and through. And did it fly by.

But what is MORE of a downer is the fact that Christmas was on Monday this year. And we have to go back to work today. YUCK!

I think that Christmas should be on Friday every year. Or better yet, Thursday. We do it for Thanksgiving, right?

And I am not talking about being irreverent to the (pardon the saying) reason for the Season. I am talking about giving the reason its due recognition, and rushing all the way through, getting everything done, and slamming through the day in the fashion that we all tend to do, we really should take more time to celebrate the day. It should be given more than one day. It should be given a whole weekend, starting on Thursday. My employer gives us the day after Thanksgiving off, so we have a 4-day weekend.

We build up to this time with such verve, leaving behind Halloween and picking right up with Christmas. Why shouldn't we be able to hold on to that feeling just a little bit longer.

I don't know if it was the lack of snow, or the fact that the stores started decorating in August, but it took me a while to get into the spirit of the Season. I don't think I was truly in that spirit until Sunday night. And now I feel robbed.

So I will take my bad attitude, check it in the corner for the day, and watch the kids bore of their Christmas gifts at about, oh, 10:00 a.m., and then start counting down the days until Christmas break is over.

Hey ... we all have to look forward to something, right?

Monday, December 25, 2006

The Aftermath

The Queen got her Gameboy Advance ...

The Man got his train set and train table ...

And the Junkie got her fix ... but don't tell her it is plastic ...

Saturday, December 23, 2006

Merry Christmas From The Knitting Maniac

Seeing as I have knitting left to do, and shopping left to do, and wrapping left to do, this is it for me for a few days.

Have good one, everyone! Happy Holidays!!!!

Friday, December 22, 2006

Simply not to be outdone

We have had our share of preschool Christmas parties. When the Queen was in her first year of preschool, I learned my lesson on the little gift bag concept when I didn't bring any little gifts for the Pumpkin Party. I slid by though because there was plenty to be put in those little goodie bags.

I did bring Christmas party favors, though and always made sure that I was on top of all of those little things that needed to be brought for goodie bags.

We always give little things like pencils or erasers or tiny containers of bubbles (yes, parents loved me that year). We don't go all out because you know, that can start to get expensive, and when you have kids in preschool for going on six years straight here, we need to decide what is important: the gift or the thought.

Of course, we all know it is the thought that counts.

But apparently, this new set of parents in the Monkey's preschool class didn't get that memo this year.

The Monkey had her party yesterday and she literally left with a small brown grocery bag full of STUFF!

A play microphone, a 4-pack of Rose Art Dough, a puzzle, two books, three long balloons with the little tube apparatus to blow them up (and promptly pop them), and the pencil that we brought.

So for those of us who showed up with pencils in tow ... are scratching our heads at these new parents.

But they will learn. Hopefully sooner rather than later.

Thursday, December 21, 2006

And we shall never speak of the antlers again

You want me to WHAT?

Yeah. I'll put it on ... for ONE minute. Nothing more.

Take the da** picture already.

I swear if you show my prom date, or worse yet, my future husband this picture, I will put you in a nursing home when you are 56.

Wednesday, December 20, 2006

TT # 22

Thirteen Reasons Why A Christmas Story Is MUCH Better Than Its A Wonderful Life

1.

The Pink Bunny Costume.

The Leg Lamp

Oh FUDGE!!!!!!!

It's Stuck!

You'll shoot your eye out, kid. Ho. Ho. HO.

6. Now you can take a vacation to the house. It's like a pilgrimage.

7. Randy eats like my kids.

8. We would all like to beat the sh** out of the local bully, and you don't get to see anything like that in It's A Wonderful Life (all right ... Ace just told me that George Bailey does get punched out in a bar ... not the same thing, though.)

9. 24 hour marathon on TBS keeps us company while we wrap presents. It really has become a Christmas tradition for us.

10. Jingle Berls on a one horsey open sleigh.

11. Randy in his snow suit. "Come on, guys... wait up." A popped tick. Priceless.

12. Sums abitches. Bumpises. Our favorite phrase around here. But not around the kids, of course.

13. Deck the Harls with boughs of Horr-ee .. Fa ra ra ra ra...ra ra ra ra.

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

Just how I feel

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas?

Well, I know what I will be talking about in my TT tomorrow.... one of my all time favorite Christmas movies.

Robin, I will have to check out Nacho Libre. I asked the Queen if she liked it, and she said "you know me ... I don't watch movies a lot." THAT is an understatement.

So ... is it really looking like Christmas in your neck of the woods? Because it certainly isn't here. And I am really, really, really trying to get into the spirit of it all, but it is hard. When Hobby Lobby starts putting their trees up in August (NOT kidding on that one), and going from Halloween directly to Christmas, practically bypassing Thanksgiving, makes it very hard to get into the swing of things.

The Christmas shopping is almost finished. We just have a few things to finish up for the kidlets. I have to make a scrapbook (yes, I haven't even STARTED) for the Mominator. I bought this really cool chipboard book for her to fill up. I just might go look at Hobby Lobby at their scrapbook kits that are on sale at 30 percent off this week just so I don't have to start from scratch on it. I also have to finish up the MIL's Stampin' Up calendar. But she won't be here for another week or so, so I have time on that one. You know, why do today what you can put off until tomorrow. That's my motto....

The kids have their respective Christmas parties tomorrow and Friday. We have to get party favors to the Man's and Monkey's classes, and books to the Queen's and Man's classes. Those are purchased and wrapped, believe it or not. I am actually AHEAD of the game on that one, only because the Man asked me nicely to get them yesterday, and I had the time to do it.

I haven't baked.

I haven't wrapped (but in my defense, that doesn't happen until the Eve).

The tree IS up. The decorations ARE out. The house IS decorated. So we do have the outward appearance of being prepared for this holiday.

And that is what is important right? No matter how scattered you might be on the inside, as long as you give the outward appearance of being prepared, all things will go well.

And that is my mantra for the remainder of the week.

Now, if we can just get the weather to cooperate as I just heard that we are in for the mid to upper 40s. No white Christmas for us....

I'm singing in the shower ...and in the kitchen...and sweeping the living room floor

Some of you who know me will know who I am talking about when I say this.

Over at PayPerPost, there is an opportunity that I decided to take about ....

Home Karaoke Machine Guide

Let me just say this: I know of a few people who would SOOOO have one of these in their house.

One of them is the soprano diva of our choir (not me, of course... I'm the alto diva ... wink!)

And the other would be ...

well...

ok. Me.

Wouldn't it be a hoot to have one? I used to when I was growing up, and I loved playing with it. But it wasn't the full-blown machine. It was more of a large tape player with a big speaker and a microphone. But I would sing and sing and sing into it.

I could SOOO see our Soprano Diva having one, too. Because she is the type that loves the sound of her voice. All. The. Time.

This is a paid advertisement opportunity from PayPerPost.

Tuesday, December 19, 2006

Bah Humbug!

Since I went out on a limb and admitted that I am developing a love affair for Brokeback Mountain, I have decided that I will out myself on another movie.

This is a much-loved movie during this time of year. It plays quite a bit during the Christmas and holiday season, and every time it comes on, I cringe. I hope that Ace doesn't see that it is listed in the lineup for entertainment for that evening.

The movie?

It's A Wonderful Life.

I can't stand it.

I have no idea why. I can't really put my finger on it. Maybe it is because it is "expected" of me to like it. Ace likes it. Mini Martha likes it. Then why shouldn't EVERYone like it? It is a classic.

But not to me.

That little girl in the end ... that whole angels get their wings everytime a bell rings. Bleck. Bile rising up in my throat over that one.

And I seriously HAVE given the movie a chance. I did sit down and watch it. Once. And that was all I needed.

I guess we all just have our favorites, but I haven't heard of anyone else who detests this movie as much as I do.

Anyone?

American Greetings Calendar

What a cool tool!!! I just signed up for an online calendar from American Greetings! It was uber cool and entering information is uber easy!

I admit it ... I forget things. I forget dates. I forget that I need to bring things for the Monkey's preschool, or include something in the Man's backpack.

But I also forget birthdays. If I don't write them down, I don't remember. Isn't that horrid? And it normally is my MIL's birthday. It always sneaks up on me when I least expect it, and boom. I have forgotten.

This little calendar will EMAIL me when it the day of the event! Like, it will email me when CKU registration day is upon us (which is soon, ladies!). It will email me when it is my brother's birthday, which is next week (did you even KNOW I have a brother?).

It is a cool little thing! You should go check it out!

This is a PayPerPost opportunity entry.

Good idea or bad?

The Mominator is a retired English teacher and librarian. She has been working part-time jobs since her retirement (she didn't work long enough for her retirement to have vested, hence her "need" to still work), and has been looking for other teaching positions along the way.

She found one. In Arizona.

I am sure that you have figured out by now that we live in Ohio.

Ohio. To Arizona. By herself. For six months. Driving there. Living alone. 66 years old.

To me, this screams "BAD IDEA!"

To her, it screams "I can't make up my mind too quickly ... I know they need me at the beginning of the month next month but I still don't know what I want to do."

She doesn't have a high level of confidence. As much as she states her opinions when she should keep them to herself, that is as far as it goes because it is with her family. Well, ok... and her friends. Ok ... and some others. But other than that, she has some trouble with doing things on her own.

If she was 10 years younger, I would say go for it. But I see my parents' health starting to fade ever so slightly. My Dad has a tremor in his left hand that the Mominator says is from an old neck injury. I think that is her way of sugar coating the real reason for the tremor.

Their driving isn't the best. In fact, it makes me downright nervous. Not that they are the types who should have their licenses taken away from them, but they do point and gun it a lot.

And Mini Martha and I are finding ourselves being placed in the position of the parents and they the children. It scares both of us that she is going to go out to a place, sight unseen, and try to make it her home for five months. We have this feeling that her continued silence on the issue means that she will go. I just don't want her to get into a situation that is beyond her control and not be able to get out of it. Doomsday attitude? Maybe. But in this day and age, and the area where she is looking at teaching, I am extremely leery of this whole setup.

So ... what do you think? Good idea or bad?

Monday, December 18, 2006

I wish I knew how to quit you

Ok. I can't get Brokeback Mountain out of my mind.

I know. This movie is SOOO two years ago. Ace and I saw it on DVD, and the funny thing about that was ... the television that we watched it on was so dark, we thought that "the" scene in the tent was all dark and all you heard were the noises, so it was left to the viewer's imagination on what happened.

Now it is playing on the movie channels, and I happened to watch it a few weeks ago on our new tv. And guess what? That scene ain't dark. So there is little left to the imagination after viewing that.

The first time we watched it, I didn't think it was a stellar movie. I'm not a huge Jake or Heath fan. I think Jake has beautiful eyes, but that is about all. So I wasn't singing its praises.

But now that it is playing on the movie channels, it is one of those that I will sit and watch. A few times.

And now I know why. I am an aural person. I LOVE the music, and I love the scenery against which the movie is set. I love the whole desolation of the movie. A love that will not be realized. A love that died when Jake's character died in the end. But that theme music ... it just stays with me. That bluegrassy, country feeling of it. I love it.

And when that final scene of Heath opening up the closet and saying "Jack, I swear" with tears in his eyes, looking at the picture of the mountain where they shared their love.... it has stayed with me for quite a while now.

I guess I love movies that are doomed from the beginning because there is always a part of me that is hoping that it will all work out in the end.

And yes. I am going to admit this: that movie was sexy to me. There. I said it. Another favorite scene of mine is when Jack is standing by the fire and is sleeping on his feet, and Ennis comes up from behind him and puts his arm around his neck and talks to him.

It was that love, that love that could never be realized.... it just gets to me. And I can't stop thinking about it....

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While you are here, click on my new renter's thumbnail to the left ... she's got an uber cool blog, and she and I share the same feelings about that da** spam email! When you are there, stop in and comment, too!

Alternate spellings

Last week, Ace put the last coat of chalkboard paint on our kitchen door. Remember me saying how absent-minded I am when I have to bring something? This is my little helper ... I spend a few minutes each night, writing out the schedule for the next day if it is packed full of stuff. This week, it is all about the Christmas parties that the kids have this week. Book exchanges, sprinkles, party favors, and canned goods are all things that need to be taken to respective schools this week. It will be a fun one.

As soon as Ace put the door back on its hinges, the kids primed it for us with their artwork and writings. It was a lot of fun watching them putting their own personal touches to the door, and then erasing them only to start all over again.

Last Sunday, my work crunch day, Ace came back and said ...

I am SOO sorry. I know that you are trying to get work done, but you HAVE to come out here and see what the Man wrote on the door. He turned to me and said "Daddy ... is this how you spell chalk board?"

As I walked into the kitchen, I instantly wished I had brought the camera...

COCK BORK

was written in very plain letters on the door. I had to make a hasty escape to the hallway so the Man didn't see me bust out laughing at the alternate spelling.

Sunday, December 17, 2006

A sign of great things to come?

I have very vivid dreams. I can instantly remember my dreams upon waking because of the bizzare-ness of the nature of them. When I was in college, I had a dream with Harrison Ford, Sean Connery, Danny Devito, Abraham Lincoln, Sammy Hagar, Godzilla, and Cruella DeVille. All in the same dream. And no, I had NOT been drinking the night before I had the dream. It was a wild one, let me tell you. I know that dreams only last a few minutes, but to me that dream lasted the entire night.

So it was no surprise this week that I dreamt that I was this guy:

I don't know who he is specifically, but the "he" I am speaking of is the tuba player who dots the script Ohio at the Ohio State University football games.

This is what it looks like on the field...

It is rich in tradition, and to dot the "i" is a huge, huge honor.

So I had a dream that I was in the OSU Marching Band. I vividly remember the choice being made, and it being announced that I would be the one to dot the "i." I practiced my moves, I practiced my bow, I practiced EVERYthing.

I don't remember a lot about the actual game, but I do remember rushing home to look at my picture on the Internet.

And the funny thing about the whole dream: I used to play trombone for an SEC school in the marching band and I was much more svelte in those marching band days, so I know what I looked like in my uniform. So I expected to see my college self in that picture, but was not at all surprised when I saw the me I am now, wearing a tye dye tshirt.

Saturday, December 16, 2006

Admiral Adama ... yougotanylipgloss?

You HAVE to go read Robin's blog entry today ... she is in my blogroll under Welcome to My World. She was at my Christmas concert last night and was a Godsend in helping out with the kids. Our motto is: if they have to be in church, we all band together and all things are community property. And that would apparently include Robin's lip gloss. It is a hilarious entry, and it really depicts the Monkey's insatiable appetite for the shiny stuff!!! I think Santa could bring her a box full of the stuff and she would be happy as a clam. Sicker than a dog, but happy nonetheless.

So now I have a shirt with a whole bunch of lip gloss stains on the arms where the Monkey wiped it all off and started her circuit all over again. Because not only did she hit up Robin at least 20 times last night for the shiny concoction, she also went to my sister and a mutual friend of ours. That friend greeted me with "does your daughter have a lip gloss addiction?" Oh ... you just DO NOT understand...

The concert went well for the first night. One more to go, and then singing tomorrow morning. It will be good to not have to sing for a few days.

AND the best news of all ... Battlestar Galactica will be back on on January 21. So, Jedimerc, you were TOTALLY correct in your assessment. Of course, leave it to the writers to leave us sitting on the edge of our seat. But at least I didn't have to throw anything at the television this time around. I fear this will be teaser, though. I have this feeling that there will be about 6 more episodes, and then we will have to wait. Again.

So today is one spent in front of the computer. All. Day. Long. Not looking forward to it, but it has to be done as Ace has informed me that he has to go into work tomorrow after hours and install some new software. So when you hear the words backup the main server and install new software on 7 computers, doesn't sound like a quick job to me.

Well, off to eat some donuts. Have a good Saturday!

Friday, December 15, 2006

Baby dolls forgotten

Having two girls in this house, we have our share of baby dolls. We have a Bitty Baby from when the Queen was little, and we have the twin American Girl dolls that the Monkey plays with on occasion. The little girl has her hair up in pigtail on the top of her head, and the little boy just has hair. The other day, the Monkey looked at me and said "this is the girl. She has lip gloss on." It took me about five minutes to convince her that it was not the girl but the boy because he didn't have a pony tail in his hair. I still don't think she believes me.

So when it was discussed that a baby doll needs to be placed in the manger for one of the songs in our musical presentation this evening, I volunteered Bitty Baby (or Baby Amy in these here parts).

I found Baby Amy, cleaned her up, dressed her because we can't have a naked baby sitting in for Baby Jesus. I don't know how we will explain the string on Baby Jesus' neck, though.

Did I mention that we have chalkboard paint on our backdoor now to help me remember things as I am walking out the door? Did I mention that I had BRING BABY AMY TO CHOIR PRACTICE TONIGHT written in huge letters at eye level? Did I mention that I placed Baby Amy on the stove right next to the back door where I HAD to walk past her when I left for practice?

You know where this is going, of course. I left Baby Amy on the stove right where I placed her and waltzed out the door without her. However, I DID remember to bring someone's Avon order to her because that was important, too.

When I wearily returned home from our close to three hour choir practice last night, I walked right past Ace's attempt at humor.

In our back landing area, he had placed Baby Amy/Baby Jesus on a shelf with a note attached to her/him...

Boo Hoo! Knitting Maniac hates me! She left me at home. Sadly, Baby Jesus

Thursday, December 14, 2006

The little girl who loves lip gloss

She loves all things Princess. She loves all things pink. She loves all dresses that look like "hula skirts" and will drop trow in two seconds flat if it looks like a better hula opportunity has presented itself.

She loves to chew gum, greeting complete strangers with the timeless question "you got any gum?" She loves Tic Tacs, just asking last week as she consumed the last of Nana's Tic Tacs at Pizza Hut "Nana... you got any mo Tic Tacs at home?"

She loves lip gloss. She will point to anyone's lips and query "they got lipgloss on?" with a quizzical look on her face. If the answer is no, they don't have lip gloss on, she will move on. If they do, she is mesmerized. "It's pretty!" "I need some lip gloss. I need some lip gloss. INEEDSOMELIPGLOSS!!!"

She is insatiable on her quests for lip gloss, gum, and the perfect hula outfit.

And now she is an artist.

Lest you think I lie about my choir director not liking me...

I have always stated that my choir director isn't too enamored of me. I think I am finally figuring it all out but he still gets under my skin. On my last nerve. Whatever.

This is the latest from him (sent to the choir as a whole):

I want to be careful not to send you too much sound from the monitors, especially since there is a lot of sound from the orchestra as a whole. I will be asking to brass to come down more to assist with this. Do your best not to oversing because of the level of music. I struggle with this myself, but we just have to trust things are being picked up in the mics.

Do you know what that translates to?

I do. Last night, the sound man came down and adjusted the microphone that was pointed directly at me down to the floor. Think that speaks volumes? And there are two of us who can carry things with no mikes, and she was at the opposite end of the row from me.

And you know what? I am STILL going to sing the way I sing, no matter who tells me to stop singing so loudly. I can sing, and noone is going to tell me to stop using that talent.

So there. Put THAT in your pipe and smoke it!

Now can you see why I struggle with singing?

I'm such a wallflower.

TT # 21

Last night, I was at choir practice from 7 until close to 10 pm. Tonight I have to do it all over again. Tomorrow night, I have to be at church at 6 for a concert that starts at 7, and do the same thing for Saturday night. Then I have to be at church at 8 am on Sunday morning because I am on frontline vocals. Needless to say, this list is properly titled

Thirteen Things I Would Rather Be Doing Than Practicing For and Singing in a Christmas Concert for the Next Three Nights

1. My job.

2. Knitting.

3. Scrapbooking.

4. Preparing for Christmas, which includes # 2 and # 3 above.

5. Sleeping.

6. Watching The Office.

7. Watching Battlestar Galactica (I will probably get to do this, but I am preparing for not being able to).

8. Sitting on my rear end, staring at the wall.

9. Washing all the windows in my house.

10. Sorting my sock drawer.

11. Vacuuming every nook and cranny of this house.

12. Blogging.

13. Did I say knitting?

Oy. What a weekend ahead. Happy TT, y'all!

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Wednesday, December 13, 2006

This ominous feeling

Today I have been having this feeling ... this nagging at the back of my head that keeps telling me that I really need to look at making a different career choice.

At my place of employment, there are some changes going on. One of those changes is a major one. Not to get into too many details, I will just throw these buzz words out there from which you draw your own conclusions: "reduction in cases being loaded into the federal queue," "repositioning/restaffing existing teams," "pilot project," and "offshoring."

This has been news around the virtual water cooler for a while now, but we are coming to the time when an assessment of the pilot project is going to be made. We have been informed that the restaffing is going to get another look in the middle of January. So this little job that I love to hate might very well be taken from me in the near future.

I don't want to be an attorney. I never have wanted to. I don't know if it is the sheer lack of faith that I have in myself, or the fact that I don't want to be lumped in with all those "other attorneys" when it comes to public perception of the profession. Working in this position has taught me a lot about that profession, too. It is cutthroat and not nice and one upsmanship all the time. I suppose it is like that everywhere else, too. But I don't want to subjectively submerge myself in that culture.

I want to make a difference. I think the post about Intern Town really started me thinking: did I choose wisely? Or did I choose what sounded "cool" at the time? The Knitting Maniac, Esquire. Yes. Sounds nice and prim and proper. But I also like the prefix of Dr. in front of my name, and I have that already.

So I have been on a few websites this afternoon, checking out their education programs.

There is something that is so "home" for me in a school. I am most positive it is because the Mominator is a retired high school English teacher and librarian. It is a profession that she has truly enjoyed her whole life, and one she never even thought twice about. She knew that was what she wanted to do.

And deep down inside, it is something I know I want, too.

I don't want elem. I want middle or high school, preferably middle school.

Call me crazy. Call me nuts. But it is something I have been craving for a very long time now.

And after reading Christi Thomas' blog this morning where her mother talks a lot about the experiences she has had as an educator, and the lovely little school that is 30 minutes from here, and really reading the true essence of how Christi lived her life up until her untimely death on September 19, it has made me step back and think long and hard about destiny and making choices and acting upon those decisions.

I need to do this. If I go more into debt, so be it. I am already over my head in law school loans as it is ... why not add more, right?

I am forever grateful for making the decision to go to law school because I would not have had this opportunity to raise my children on my own. But it is time for me to move on, to spread my wings, and do something that makes me happy in the long run.

Either that or I'll get two scoops of ice cream and call it a day.

Tuesday, December 12, 2006

Old Friends

I still live in the same smaller town in which I grew up, so there are some old friends who still reside in the general area. I don't really keep in touch with a lot of them (Robin being the exception to the rule, of course ... ). I have one friend who teaches elementary at the school from which we graduated. She is a very sweet lady, but one who really hasn't left the old days behind her successfully.

She still wears the same amount of makeup. In fact, I don't think her makeup application has changed much over the years. She owns her own tanning bed. And she uses it. I think on a daily basis. It is kind of scary how tan she is. All. The. Time.

I sang in her wedding. That wedding ended in divorce. And a re-marriage. And another divorce. I think they are leaving well enough alone now. At least I hope they are.

I didn't know that they were getting a second divorce until a good college friend of mine told me. Because he was chatting with her via MySpace and email.

And now I am frightened.

My college friend moved here to this town to attend a local college's peace officer training school. He hasn't left. I thought I would see a lot more of him, but I don't. I hear from him on occasion, but not a lot. I normally hear from him the most when he bored driving his truck, or some major life issue has hit him hard. He has a special needs daughter, and he needs to talk about her sometimes.

And then there are the times when he calls me to complain about his dating life. Or lack thereof. He has been trying to "land" a prospective mate since his divorce about 6 years ago.

And this guy ... we have a history. We met as freshmen in college, and there was a mutual attraction. And when he would get drunk, he wouldn't be able to stop telling me how much he loved me. When he was getting married (and I had been married to Ace for a year), and I was getting ready to sing at his wedding, I asked him if he was 100 percent certain that he wanted to marry this person, and he said "well the person I did want to marry has already dashed my hopes of that union, so yeah... I guess I do want to get married."

So now ... the worlds are converging.

And I get nervous. Why? I have no idea.

I guess I am afraid that I am going to get these phone calls ... what does she like? what is he like? is he a serial killer? is she clingy?

I don't want to be the one in the middle.

Maybe I won't be. Maybe they won't get past the dog butt-sniffing stage.

But if they do ... man. I better get my answering machine primed and ready to go.

Red Man Walking

Last night we decided to let the Queen skip her dance class and take the kids to see Santa and the Mrs. downtown. It is a nice little night for the kids with a visit with the Big Red Man and his wife, free hot chocolate (you are more than welcome, Robin!), and a horse-drawn wagon ride through town.

It is, on the average, around 40 to 50 degrees lately. So who wouldn't go on a night like last night?

The kids were beyond thrilled that they were going. We had our lists in hand, but when it came time to get on the Man's lap, the Door Man clammed up. He wouldn't talk. He had to hand Santa his list because he couldn't utter the words that were written there. He had even signed his list so Santa would know it was him.

The Queen, on the other hand, rattled her list off like an old pro. "I want Lincoln Logs ... but not that Wilderness One you brought that one time, a different one, and a Nintendo Gameboy Advance ... not the DS because my Dad said the Advance has better games."

Out of the Monkey's mouth was "a box of Barbies." She had to give her wish list to the Mrs. though because Santa's lap overfloweth with the older two. I am not certain that the Monkey really wants a box of Barbies... I think that was the translation that Mrs. Claus gave the conversation.

The Mrs. was having a hard time understanding the concept of K-nex. "Is that like Lincoln Logs?" she queried. The child who was having to explain to her what K-nex really are looked like he was starting to lose faith that his message would be conveyed correctly to the Big Man, so he just turned to Santa and said "I want some K-nex, Santa. She doesn't seem to understand what they are."

The horse ride was very nice, except for the grand whiffs of extremely sweaty horse bodies wafting back to us at different intervals. I totally felt sorry for those horses as we started off ... one of them lost footing and slipped. I am sure if that horse could talk, he would tell a certain few of us to get the heck off of his wagon and walk ourselves just for the exercise factor.

It was very nice, and a nice surprise to be able to spend some of that with friends. I was hoping that we would catch a glimpse of Robin's happenin' Holiday party group, and we got more than that. Robin and I couldn't stop laughing the entire wagon ride. And I am convinced that Robin's older daughter is going to be our town's next mayor because she even knew the short order cook at our local burger joint.

Hopefully the kids will cherish this memory, and the Queen can get over the public embarassment of the picture being taken in front of Juvie Court. I think she's forgotten about it .. for the time being.

Sponsored Post: Intern Town

I have been contacted for my first ReviewMe review, and I have accepted the challenge.

This is for a site called Intern Town. This site is maintained to obtain individuals from around the world (English-speaking) to fill certain intern positions. The positions last up to 12 months, and from the looks of it, the positions posted at this moment are in the United Kingdom.

I have a love affair with all things London. I have been there 8 times on vacation, and I absolutely loved it there. There was a point in time in our young married, before children lives that I had entertained the idea of going to London to find work. Ace and I just had the best time when we were there.

If this site had been around when I was still in college, I would have nabbed one of these positions in a heartbeat. There is a part of me that is envious of the indivduals who will be able to take advantage of this opportunity.

It looks to be a good experience for those involved, engaging interns in a different culture and environment from their own, and hopefully beginning successful careers for these interns.

Even if you are no longer in the "market" for being an intern, you might know of a young college student looking for internship possibilities.

Monday, December 11, 2006

Our Christmas cards...

From Our Hoosegow to Yours! Merry Christmas!

Crazy family members

We all have them. Our family has a few (I am one of them, I fear), some of whom have already left their earthly bodies.

One of those crazies was my great Aunt Fern. She was a hoot and a half. There were days that she maddened us to no end, accosting any family member who happened to walk through her door when she needed something ... anything ... salad dressing, toilet tissue, or new pens.

Aunt Fern was a real gem. People like her don't come along too often, and I was very happy to have her in our family. She was my Dad's aunt, his mother's sister. Fern and Marie. They were as different as night is from day. Marie settled down with her sweetheart, popped out four kids (my Dad is a fraternal twin), and lived in the same small town.

Fern married a roughneck, went on vacation with her husband and his mistress (not knowing of the affair at the time, obviously), and learned how to fly an airplane. She had no kids, but she had us. She considered my Dad her son and she was so thankful for that relationship.

Fern had a monkey named Pedro. Pedro wore diapers. I never knew Pedro personally, but I heard stories. Many, many stories. Only Aunt Fern would have a pet monkey.

Aunt Fern then got T.C. Tough Cat, a Persian. In the height of his day, he was a regal looking cat. At the end of his days, he was scroungy and mean. There were times when he would be almost lifeless.

Grandma would come here to visit Aunt Fern for a week at a time. On one such visit, Grandma was cleaning up a little around Aunt Fern's condo.

She came upon T.C., who appeared to have met his demise. Grandma didn't want to upset her sister right away, so she decided to put T.C. in a trash bag, and put him in the garage until my father, who was coming over later that day, arrived so he could dispose of T.C.'s body out in the country on my Mom and Dad's property.

So Grandma goes and grabs a trashbag and gingerly picks the cat up and places him in his temporary resting place.

Grandma goes about her day, trying to decide when she is going to inform Fern that T.C. was no longer amongst the living.

Grandma didn't need to because T.C. decided to tell Grandma that he wasn't dead after all. About three hours of spending time in the trash bag, he decided to remove himself from it and walk into the kitchen.

Needless to say, Grandma almost met HER demise that afternoon when that cat walked in from the garage...

Sunday, December 10, 2006

I spy with my binocular eye...

This afternoon was my niece's baby shower at my sister's house. She was getting everything around, putting food on the table, and making sure that everything was in its proper place. It is through no mistake that I have nicknamed her Mini Martha because she just has this ... knack.

And then she goes and does something so ... not Martha-like that it makes me scratch my head and laugh at her.

I had posted earlier that she is a vegan and is married to the hunter of all hunters. A man who goes out hunting just about every day that he can. So he has some high-powered gadgets around the house.

And my sister ran and grabbed one of those this afternoon....a pair of binoculars.

Now, my BIL will use them to scope out deer on his property as well as the property of others because they live out in the middle of the country.

My sister, on the other hand, uses them to look at the cars that come down the road.

So here she is, and nobody has arrived at the party yet. And she spies a car in the distance.

And she spends the next five minutes before the first car's arrival mumbling things like "i wonder who drives a white Buick" or "is that Nancy (her MIL and mortal enemy)?" or "I think that is Sharon."

It is kind of freaky to see your sister, who is so prim and proper when it comes to the ways of decorating, pick up the binoculars to play "Name that baby shower guest."

Saturday, December 09, 2006

About PayPerPost

Someone had asked me in my comments section about what PayPerPost is.

Here's your chance...

You get paid blogging about certain opportunities. You can decide what opportunity you want to take or not, so you control the content that you write about and control the sites that you want to blog about.

I always take a look at the sites that I am going to blog about, and incorporate that into a post.

And it is that easy.

So if anyone does want to sign up, you can do so ... and if you want to under me ... knittingwife@yahoo.com.

But there's no pressure. Just wanted to pass the information along because I had had a few questions.

Blog on!

My worst dream came true last night....

Ok ... it isn't THAT bad. It isn't life-threatening. It isn't even life-altering. It was just a moment in time when I felt saddened...

The words Season Finale stated at the end of the preview for next week's Battlestar Galactica.

It is over for the season, ladies and gents.

Move on, you people who don't watch because this is going to get all sci-fi-y on ya.

It is ending next week for probably a long time. Remember when they said "in October" back in February when they started to play the scenes of the upcoming season? I REALLY let loose on my other blog. I was mad. I didn't want to WAIT until October. I COULDN'T wait until October.

But guess what? I made it. And I will make it again. Even if they say "coming in December 2007."

But there WILL be swearing and some items being hurled through the air.

This is really the one and only show I crave. Some have Grey's Anatomy. Others have Survivor, while others have Lost.

I have BG. And I am darned lucky that I married a man who is as much a sci fi geek as I am.

I even want a BG tshirt. How sad is that? I need one that says "Frak" on it. Because nobody would get it. And I could have my own little secret as people looked at my chest and looked away because they didn't want to know and didn't want to ask. Because that is how much of a geek I am.

I always say "don't make eye contact with a kid who has fallen down" because they start to cry once they have your attention.

The same thing with BG people. If you get us started, we will launch into why we love it so much. Why we love this series. Why we love the characters. Why we love the special effects. Why we love Friday nights at 9. Why we love Caprica but hate Sharon. Why we secretly want Bill and Laura to "get together."

Because... we are geeks. And proud of it.

It is one of those days.

KinderChoir practice in less than an hour.

Have to have oldest child at her practice for two hours.

Have to get some work done in between 10 and 11:30.

Have to pick up my very pregnant niece to take her to her shower that I am running.

Come home and work today and into the night because I do NOT want to be working tonight.

And I better get off the computer.

But look ... there are those pink foam curlers, ladies!

Friday, December 08, 2006

Remember the lickable wallpaper in the original Willy Wonka?

If you have ever seen the original Willy Wonka, you will remember the scene where the kids all toe-up to the wall with the lickable wallpaper on it. Of course, now that I am a mother who is consumed with germs and the havoc that they wreak on five family members, I shudder when he says that it is perfect for nursery walls.

Well ... go to Ghost Works, my renter. See if that wouldn't qualify for a lickable monitor moment.... I HAVE to cook that. It looks absolutely wonderful, and I am a sheer lover of all things that can be cooked in the crockpot.

She has all the ingredients listed out there for you... if you try it, let me know what you think! I need to go out and get the ingredients but that looks like a good Saturday night meal right there! I don't have a lot of time tomorrow for anything else but the prior commitments that I have, so that will be a good meal right there.

Could I go on anymore about that meal? Oh ... probably.

But go check it out ... it is scrumdiddlyumptious ...

Thursday, December 07, 2006

Calgon, take me away

7:15 a.m.: Child # 3 enters bedroom; exclaims she has lots of boom booms; surveillance of the situation reveals large amounts of Krazy Glue on fingers; observe toes; three fake toenails (yes ... they make them) applied upside down on foot (because they looked right-side up when she applied them); observe large amounts of glue in between toes.

7:20 a.m.: Child # 3 and I spend large sum of time (30 minutes) pouring Goof Off on toenails; hoping that nasty, smelly liquid doesn't (1) peel the skin off child's toes, (2) cause a flare-up in child's asthma, or (3) poison child.

7:45 a.m.: Child # 2 emerges from room; instantly wants breakfast; told to stand in line to receive maternal attention; # 2 sulks off into living room to parental unit # 3, the television.

7:47 a.m.: Extraction of fake toenails is completed; child # 3 starts crying because she can't have child # 1's fake fingernails on the counter.

8:00 a.m.: Child # 1 comes out of room wearing same shirt she wore to school yesterday; argument ensues about shirt mother chooses; mother wins... for now.

8:08 a.m.: Phone rings; the Mominator wants to talk for a few minutes; arguments between all three children ensue; end phone conversation abruptly.

8:10 a.m.: Child # 1 is sitting on the loveseat applying aforementioned fake nails; inform child that she will indeed miss the 8:14 bus; child looks surprised and feigns an attempt at getting up and putting on coat; leave living room and later convinced that child sat back down and continued to apply fake nails.

8:14 a.m.: Bus pulls up outside and waits; wave bus on; bus leaves; child # 1 feigns remorse about missing bus.

8:28 a.m.: Decide that it is high time to get child # 3 ready for preschool; child decides that the best outfit of choice is a floatation swimsuit; try to convince child that swimming is out in this 20 degree weather; child doesn't seem too convinced as she runs away; child is captured and placed in the Naughty Corner for not listening to her mother's pleas to come get ready for school; discuss with child the importance of listening to her mother the first time that something is asked of her.

8:30 a.m.: Ask child # 2 to find some shoes; child does not want to leave his dry erase board project of writing the day of the week and the date; take marker from child and ask him to find shoes; child cries out and refuses to look for shoes; child is placed in the Naughty Corner after # 3 leaves it.

8:38 a.m.: Locate child # 2's shoes; place them on child's feet; repeat same discussion with child that was discussed with child # 3 ten minutes earlier.

8:52 a.m.: Ready children to leave the house to drop not one, but TWO children off at school; child # 1 asks if she will be dropped off first because if she isn't, she will be late to school; contemplate making child late to school to drop child # 3 off at preschool first; decide that # 1's school is closer so she will go first.

8:56 a.m.: Drop child # 1 off at school.

9:15 a.m.: Drop child # 3 off at school.

9:18 a.m.: Declare to child # 2 that Mommy is taking a shower as soon as we arrive home.

9:28 a.m.: Arrive home; proceed to check work email; surf Thursday 13s; waste time at computer.

9:50 a.m.: Call in on local AM station to register for a Christmas present giveaway.

10:10 a.m.: Friend Jacque calls; discuss the trials of stay at home momhood; the Mominator walks in; end phone conversation.

10:20 a.m.: Mominator offers a reprieve; jump in shower; ready myself for the day.

The rest of the day was uneventful until....

4:22 p.m.: After not seeing child # 3 even though child # 2 had gone in and opened the door to her room to wake her up, take matter into own hands; walk in room; smell something; see something on pillow ... and on child ... and all over bed.

4:22 p.m.: Call husband at work to ask him if he could pick up child # 1 from Brownies at school; re-enter smelly room; remove sheets; Febreeze the air; throw sheets and pillow down basement stairs to be dealt with later; set child # 3 up in our bedroom with crackers and apple juice; pray that this is a one time deal.

4:30 p.m.: Call Poison Control to make sure that child # 3 hasn't been poisoned by the Goof Off seeping into her skin from her toes; concerned that PC representative has taken down names, phone number, and zip code; waiting for call from friend Robin with a head's up that Children's Services will be knocking on the door in the near future.

5:41 p.m.: Leave for Sterling to get meet child # 3's hankering for Lucky Charms; pray that won't be the wrong decision later.

One more day...

One more day. One more day until I receive my first money from PayPerPost. So far, I have earned $ 30.60. This post will earn me a bit more to add to the grand total.

And guess what I am saving my money for?

This trip.

Remember when I whined that my scrapbook friends were at Queen of the Crop back in November and I couldn't go because of lack of moulah? Well I decided to just go ahead and see if I could get a little cash to start saving for the trip. And that is exactly what I have done so far.

I can't WAIT for this trip! It is going to be a blast! Queen will PALE in comparison. Ok. How do I really know that? I don't. I'm just saying that to sound like I know what happened ... when really I have NO idea.

So I can't wait... and I will certainly be keeping my eye out for more post opportunities along the way. Thanks to another blog buddy for alerting me to this great system!

TT # 20

Thirteen Things Running Through My Head Tonight

1. WHY does everyone have a cold? They are driving me INSANE! (I'm not one of the sickos, if you can't tell)

2. I have too much to do next week. I have something EVERY single night next week. WHEN am I going to get my work done? And it is too late to take vacation days.

3. I GET TO GO TO CKU IN APRIL!!!! Woo HOO!

4. Robin sure does have a nice husband.

5. I have a pretty nice husband, too. You should have heard him when he dropped his Coke down the basement stairs, though. He rarely swears ... tonight was a banner night for swearing.

6. CRAP! Christmas is less than 20 days away now. Where did all that time go?

7. I don't think I will be able to knit four pairs of felted mocs, a pair of pants, finish up a pair of pants, knit two hats, a pair of leg warmers, and finish an octopus before Christmas. Do you?

8. Why is it ALWAYS so cold in our bedroom?

9. Why does the Monkey have to start taking on the traits of a smart aleck? You should have seen her in KinderChoir tonight. Ugh!

10. UGH! We have a KinderChoir performance on Sunday. It was different being the observer; now I am semi-responsible for whether Little Jimmy is going to pick his nose all the way through the performance.

11. CRAP! I have to finish planning stuff for my niece's baby shower this weekend. Great.

12. I need to get a new sound machine/clock radio. I think I fried it ... when it doesn't tell time but just emits that green light that has all the numbers lit on it, I think that is a good sign. But the sounds still work. That reminds me of the line in Planes, Trains, and Automobiles when the state trooper pulls them over after their car caught fire ...

Do you have any idea how fast you were going?

Funny enough, I was just talking to my friend about that. Our speedometer has melted and as a result it's very hard to see with any degree of accuracy exactly how fast we were going. But the radio sure does work.

13. I need to go to bed. I should have gone to bed over an hour ago and skipped Top Chef. I really liked the person who was booted. And that challenge... PUHLEASE! That was the ultimate of unfair.

Oooooo.... I wish this had been around when I was pregnant!

I didn't come upon the world of organic food until Mini Martha went all vegan on me. But I did cloth diaper my last child and I loved EVERY. LAST. MINUTE. of it. I couldn't wait to reach for that next diaper, knowing that I wasn't filling the landfill with her diapers.

So how cool is this site: an organic baby shop. I seriously would have loved to have this resource available to me!

I know that some of the baby food makers have entered into the world of organic baby foods, but with markets nowadays really trying to focus more and more on that as a choice for their consumers, it still seems like baby foods and organic choices for your child aren't really there. And I am not the first one to admit that I would buy organic adult food and puree it to put in ice cube trays to freeze. That was my cousin, the pediatrician. Not me. I like the jars. So it is nice to see all of these choices centralized in one area.

I am going to have to forward this on to some online friends of mine who are expecting again, and I certainly will be sending this link to my niece, who is expecting her first baby at the end of January.

Oh man ... I wish I had seen this site before getting ready for my niece's shower for this weekend, too! There is a really cook pregnancy kit in there.

Well ... I will bookmark it ... because that baby won't grow up overnight.

Wednesday, December 06, 2006

Perfect timing

This morning as I was showering, I decided to take the younger two to lunch at Panera. We hadn't been there for a while, and the Monkey loves their soup. I got everyone around, got shoes and socks on, got everyone pottied, and we headed off to Panera.

I had the Door Man take his backpack because I didn't want to rush back to get him on the bus. I was just going to drop him off at school because we were already running late as it was.

We get to Panera, and the kids and I are standing in line.

I look at the Door Man and think "that right eye looks funny."

"Hey dude, when I asked you if your contacts were in this morning, were you sure that they were in? Because it looks like your right lens is missing."

"Oh yeah. I forgot to tell you ... it was missing when I woke up."

WHAT?!?!?!?!!? WTHeck?!?!?!?!

This was AFTER I asked him if he had his contacts in. Three times.

This was AFTER we had left the house and weren't going to be returning with him in tow.

This was AFTER the contact fell out of his eye and was sitting out for more than 12 hours now.

This was AFTER I went on a rampage and started throwing all the clothes that he has thrown on his floor up onto his bed.

Needless to say, I didn't find that right lens. I am putting Ace on it tonight. Ace the Contact Detective. Maybe I should put Queen Bee on it because she can find them in the blink of a de-lensed eye.

So he is wearing an old Rx in his left eye and his left lens in his right eye. Because his parents don't buy extras at $ 250 a pop. Yes. $ 250 for a pair of contacts for this boy.

These are the lenses that my insurer loves to deny coverage on. You can read about my rantings here but I warn you .... if you don't want to read bad, bad, foul-mouthed, really nasty, wouldn't kiss your mother with that potty mouth, don't read the post. Seriously. I was mad. I was enraged. I was being a protective mother bear in the post.

So I think I have warned you enough on that one. Right?

Now I need to get some new lenses for him, but he really needs to see his docs first.

This boy goes all Harry Houdini with his lenses. One time, on our way to his checkup in the Wolverine State, he literally LOST his lens. In his carseat. They had to get him a new lens when we got there, and then the dr. went and changed the Rx on them. So we paid for a lens to be worn for 10 whole minutes.

These contacts and I have a love/hate relationship.

At least he didn't say "oh yeah... they both fell out and I ate them."

But that would end the search for them. I don't know. Double-edged sword.

Why don't you turn that high-powered perception at yourself and tell us what you see, or, maybe you're afraid to

Thanks to my dear friend Robin for alerting me to this, a cool scrapbook that tells people about me. AND $ 3 of every purchase goes immediately to support breast cancer initiatives. The kit is $ 15, people. Robin had shown me part of it at our church craft night a few months ago. So when Ace asked me what I wanted for my birthday (on the Sunday BEFORE my birthday, mind you), I immediately showed him this kit and he bought it for me.

I received it yesterday, and I started putting it together. It is an amazing kit, full of great products including some Heidi Swapp. It is the best bang for your buck if you ask me.

I scrapbook with the same modus operandi that I knit: I don't ever do it for myself. It is always for someone ... the family or parental units for presents. So when I started looking at this kit and reading the prompts for journaling, I was formulating what I would write in those spaces.

There is journaling for things that make me mad, sad, afraid, and happy. I started to think of things I would put there.

I am dedicating a whole page to knitting, thinking of how I am going to lay it out.

And then the biggie ... I have to actually put PICTURES of myself in there.

Of me. Not of the kids. Not of me and the kids. Not of me and Ace (although that is totally acceptable on a page or two). Just me. And one suggestion that they had was to take a very up close and personal picture of my face.

This I am not too sure about.

But it will certainly make me take a look at myself, which I haven't done in a long time. Time for a personal assessment. And time to see what truly makes me ... well, me.

Tuesday, December 05, 2006

My cool find

I was reading someone's blog, who had mentioned the ReviewMe site. I signed up for it, but haven't gotten any bites on reviews. BUT I did get paid $ 20 for writing about the site in the first place, and that still sits in my PayPal. I am saving it for a rainy day, or a scrapbook retreat, whichever comes first. But now, my dearest friend Robin has informed me that our girls' kids' choir is having a performance on the Sunday of CKU, which is a total bummer.

Ok. How is it that I digress the way I do? This morning, another friend and I were talking on the phone, and we were having respective issues with our kids, having to tell the other to hold on a minute at least 2 or 3 times a piece. I said "if anyone ever listened in on our conversations, they would probably run into the street screaming 'THE INSANITY!'"

Because this is how my brain works...

I came on here to spread the word about this place ... www.mrcheapstuff.com.

This isn't a paid plug. This is actually me wanting to say something about a site, and totally forgetting to do that every time I post something.

They have different coupons on there, plus they have freebies.

So far, I have scored two packs of Playtex tampons (I ain't too proud to boast about free feminine hygiene products, ok?), a kick-a** Gillette Sensor razor from CVS with coupons on the blades (and we're not talking a disposable here, ladies and gents ... it is the real deal ... I had told my sister that if I had been smarter, I would have wrapped it up for Ace for Christmas and smiled when he thanked me profusely for spending that money on him for a new razor with FIVE cutting blades!), and a sample of Pepcid Complete (which came in handy last week after my dinner at a local pizza joint whose pepperoni is notorious for giving me the worst heartburn ever ... it knocked out that heartburn in five seconds flat. It almost caused me to purchase more, but when I saw that the Pepcid Complete was $ 4.50 for EIGHT tablets, I reached for the 100 count Wal Mart antacids, instead ... yeah. They almost got a new customer).

I have a package of Orville Redenbacher coming, plus some Pledge or Swifter duster thingies ... I think Swifter. I am having a good time on the site.

I suggest you give a whirl ... and that is my unpaid, unsolicited endorsement of Mr. Cheap Stuff.

and I am sure there is something wrong with this assessment

I was over at Adventures of an Awesome Mom, and saw a little logo in her sidebar. I clicked on it, plugged in my url, and got this...

Of course, this is just for fun ... I just love blogging. What can I say ... I'm verbose.

Obsessions Part Deux

I love the look of well-polished, taken care of fingernails. But not enough to attempt to grow my own. The nails have to be strong. I can't stand it when they bend and are flimsy. That is like running nails on a chalkboard to me.

My nails are not the best candidate to be beautiful. I am sure that it means that I am lacking in something in my diet. What I don't know ... calcium...vitamins...something.

I was sitting next to our church secretary last week in choir practice, and I looked at her nails. They were nicely done in a french manicure. I commented on them, and she said "two pairs...Wal Mart...$ 8.99."

I couldn't get those nails out of my mind. I HAD to have them.

I used to subject myself to the torture of the nail salons. I would walk out of there with bloody cuticles or some infection growing on my nail. But I would go back. I loved having them.

Then the Door Man was born, and he had to wear contacts. I decided to forego the nails from then on out. I was saddened, but I got over it, and I didn't need to spend that money every two or three weeks just for the sake of fulfilling my obsession.

So when I saw these nails ... these highly-obtainable, on my way home from church nails ... well, I had to have them.

On my way home from picking the Queen up from dance class, I had to stop at Walgreen's to get some Sudacare vaporizer inserts because the girls are doing these great impressions of seals during mating season. And I had to walk past the nails.

And there they were. I did not realize the sheer amount of choices in nails these days.

So I picked out what I wanted, and promptly went home to start applying them.

Who would have known that some super glue and a pack of nails would cause so much interest. The Monkey took a handful of the unused ones and went into the living room to play with them. Queen wouldn't leave my side the entire time because she had already chosen the ones from the remnants that ~~overpowered~~ fit her nails. She was begging me to put them on her, and I kept telling her no.

And I was promptly reminded why I had chosen to go the route of the nail salon and their instruments of torture: super glue and me ... not a perfect match.

I had to pry two nails off of the same exact spot on my left index finger, and now the spot is raw from it. And I also have this one nail on my right hand that is leaning to the left.

But for $ 5.50, what can I expect?

They are bringing a smile to my face, though. This is really the only "girly" indulgence that I partake in. I have my eyebrows waxed when my beautician makes a face and says "can I get those for you?" I get my hair color from a box, and that doesn't occur often. I NEVER get pedicures because my one and only mortal enemy is not a pedicurist, and she is the only person I would subject to doing these feet.

So there is a little glimpse about me ... the nail-obsessed, Clairol Nice and Easy # 114A woman who shouldn't be left in a room with a tube of super glue.

Also, when you get the chance, click on the thumbnail on the left to go visit my new renter, Ghost Works! She has come out of the closet and admitted that she watches Rachael Ray! LOL! I will join her ... I watch Rachael Ray, too because I am waiting for that one time when she CAN'T make a meal in under 30 minutes.

Please share the love, stop over at her place, and check her out! Click on that thumbnail....I dare ya!

Monday, December 04, 2006

Obsessions

At this house, we have obsessions. They can last a short time and burn out quickly, or they can stick around for quite a while and I wonder when they will ever end.

The Door Man was obsessed with doors. He still is, to some degree, but when he was growing up, he would just open. and shut. and open. and shut. We used to joke that we were going to install a door frame on the wall for a Christmas present, and that would be all he would ever want or need that Christmas.

The Door Man is now a paper obsessed-fiend. He loves paper. All sorts of paper. And that paper has to have his writing on it. He writes all sorts of things: days of the week, months of the year, Happy this or that. I have to get on him constantly about leaving paper all over the house.

Queen Bee never really picked up an obsession. She just moves from one thing to the next, and really concerns me that she could technically qualify for ADD meds.

And now the Chandelier Monkey has an obsession: hulas.

Hulas are dresses or skirts, but mainly are dance leotards with twirly skirts.

She wakes up. She wants a hula on.

"Where's my purple hula?" she just asked not five minutes ago. "Is it dirty?"

"Honey I don't know but here's the deal: you can't wear a hula today unless you wear a shirt underneath because it is a whopping 17 degrees outside right now."

"I not going OUTside in my hula, Mommy! I wear it in house!!!"

She came back about 5 minutes later and said "MOMMY! I want hula on NOW!"

Well excuse me then.

Like I said ... obsessed.

"Ok honey ... just let me finish blogging and I'll get to you ... after I read about three other blogs."

What was that I was saying about obsessions?

Sunday, December 03, 2006

Trains and various states of undress

One of the redeeming qualities of our newspaper is the fact that it publishes a daily docket. And not only are the escapades of my town's criminals and derelects published for public embarassment but the newspaper has a writer that has a pretty good sense of humor.

Every once in a while, when the staff writers have writer's block, they reach into the bag of goodies that the docket produces.

This weekend, Ace was entertaining me with the entries, some of which I had heard before, which didn't make them any less funny.

So tonight, I share with you the antics of my townspeople, and the wit of some unknown docket writer.

A married couple in a car parked in the middle of a township road were found in an obvious state of extreme undress.

Not just "regular" undress, which would have been embarassing enough as it was.
Extreme undress.

A man was arrested for stealing a home pregnancy test and a shot glass from a store.

I almost wet my pants on this next one because I remembered hearing it the first time around, and almost wet myself then.

A husband who jumped onto his wife's lap in a kitchen chair was treated for a thigh injury because she had been holding a kitchen knife.

Now this dude, I totally feel sorry for. I mean, a noise violation is one thing. Publicly embarassing the dude about his poor taste in music... that is a whole new ballgame right there.

A man was cited for playing K.C. and the Sunshine Band must too loud on his stereo.

This guy had a hot night on the town planned...

A man was arrested for shoplifting whiskey, condoms, and cologne from a local store.

But the next two are the winners in my book:

A driver involved in a non-injury accident on railroad tracks said the train had swerved and hit her.
An intoxicated man staggering near North Main Street was asked by city police if he knew which street he was on. 'This one,' he replied.

So ... do you have a daily docket? And do you see some doozies in it?

Saturday, December 02, 2006

Wouldn't this be a hoot!

I have been knitting for over three years now. I can't believe that sometimes... that I have had the wherewithal to stick it out that long. And my passion is still going strong. I don't see the embers of that burning desire to feel the yarn in my fingers and hear the click of the needles being extinguished anytime too soon.

I knit for a lot of people... my customers, my kids (not so much), and for family/Christmas presents. I have not knit myself anything for a really long time. In fact, I don't ever recall finishing a project for myself. I might have made myself one slipper sock. And a lot of good one does, right?

So when I saw the addition to the most recent edition of Knitty.com, I fell in love ... with this.

I want to knit this. What is the practicality of it? The opportunities are endless.

Wearing it to the grocery store.

Wearing it when your daughters are picked up for their first dates.

Wearing it to school to pick up the kids.

Wearing it to overnight family functions, and spending most of the day in it until it is time to "fix your hair." I SO could have embarassed the ever living crap out of my MIL at Thanksgiving had I donned this beauty.

Wearing it to drop the kids off at school.

Seriously, I am VERY close to getting the supplies for it. And you know what? I think I AM going to make this.

But I think I will make it for my aunt first.

Friday, December 01, 2006

Murphy's Law doesn't even cover it

If it didn't happen to me, I would be a little leery of this tale being told by anyone else. But it was me ... and this is what happened.

My work computer went on the fritz. That has already been established. I work from home, so I don't have anyone I can call to ask them to come down and fix my mouse, or get me hooked back up to the network.

I have learned to troubleshoot a lot of issues, and I have learned to recognize a lot of the problems that a computer can create.

When I was getting the Windows message last week, I had a feeling something was happening with the hardware, and it would call for a new PC to be shipped to me. And that is what happened.

I received the PC on Wednesday, and immediately hooked it up. Immediately, I had no internet connection. I tried a lot of things ... unplugged, plugged back in, shut off, let it sit for 1 minute, etc. All of the things I knew that someone down the line was going to ask me. Still nothing.

So I called my employer's tech desk. They said it sounded like a modem/internet connection. After typing in ipconfig, we determined that I wasn't throwing an IP address, so that meant connectivity.

So I called my provider. Let's say it is the one with the cute little Warner Bros. cartoon character. Not naming any names.

I had it running through a router, and we determined that was where the problem was. As soon as I disconnected the router and plugged the modem directly into my PC, all was well.

We have a high wind warning today until 7 tonight. And there is local flooding. I promise, there is a correlation.

When there is a large amount of ground water, our service is sporadic. And with the high wind, I had a feeling things were going to be a little dicey today.

At 9, I came back to witness a dead modem. No power light. No nothing. So I call my provider. We both surmise that it is fried, and that I would go pick up a modem at my local office because it would take them until Monday or Tuesday to get me a modem. I highly doubt it takes THAT long, but you know those companies.

I bundle the kids up (did I mention that we started off at over 50 degrees today and are supposed to drop to freezing, along with the 60 mph wind gusts? ... yeah.... pleasant day), and we head over to the provider's office. I receive a new modem.

I come home, think I am golden and try to hook it up.

It hooks up, I get all of the required lights, and I think I am in business.

I'm not. Because I have no service connection. Instead, I receive a screen that tells me I need to "provision" my modem. Which is company-speak for "you are screwed."

In the meantime, the Mominator comes in and promptly misplaces her car key. She decides to stay there to get the Man on his bus, and to drive me apeshit looking for her car key. She also rains down the information that there is a power pole on the street over from mine that is precariously hanging over the street. I think nothing of it, which proved to be a big mistake later.

So I return to my bedroom with the phone attached to my ear because I have decided to call the support line to get my modem provisioned.

I reach a level 1 specialist. She can't help me. She promptly transfers me (without telling me) to a level 2 specialist. She tells me that I have to speak with a level 3 person, and says she is going ot transfer me. Instead, she transfers me back to level 1. I explain to the level 1 person that I NEED to speak to the level 3 person. The level 1 person asks me no questions and sends me back to level 2. I guess she wasn't listening.

So I speak with the level 2 person, who tells me that the initial level 2 person must have hit the wrong transfer button (gee... do ya think?), so he said "you will hear a series of beeps as I transfer you. Just stay on the line as we are busy, but someone will get to you momentarily."

No series of beeps. Just two clicks. You know the ones ... the "I have just cut you off" clicks, and then the fast busy signal.

Nice. That was 30 minutes of my time wasted.

So I get back on the phone and try it all over again. I immediately get to a level 2, who sent me to level 3. Where I sat. And sat. And sat. And sat.

I decided to call my manager in all of this as I had two cases that needed to be sent in within a certain period of time. So I spoke with him for a few minutes, and we discussed the downfall of the cable provider industry.

Then my phone started beeping. It had been off its charger for a few days, so I guess it had decided that an hour's worth of phone time straight was too much for its system.

So I go out to the kitchen, and grab our other phone.

And I blame the next action on the fact that my brain cells were slowly oozing out of my ear. I turned the phone I was on off before I turned the phone I needed on. So it was no surprise that I heard dial tone when I picked up the second phone.

At this point, I start to question my sanity

and I decide to delve back into the world of customer service.

I FINALLY get through to the level 3 person that I need to talk to. She asked me a few questions, and then said she was going to be sending the software to my modem to get it to run.

The lights blinked on and off, and finally the support person said "can you restart your PC for me?"

Seeing the light at the end of the tunnel, I say yes.

And I do. No sooner did I start to utter the words that my computer had booted back up and was ready to be tested on internet connection and ....

MY POWER GOES OUT!

Out. Gone. For an hour.

I called my boss, and he said "I think there is a country song out there about this same exact situation."

If there isn't, there will be. And it's going to be called....

Mamas Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up to be Utility Workers

I'm a mom of three peeps ... Queen Bee, The Door Man, and the Chandelier Monkey, and wife to Ace, the Helpful Hardware Man. I created this space to get away from the people known as my inlaws, and because life with three kids and a hubby is all Unexplored Territory.

The nine-year-old who seems to be growing older every minute, has an opinion and a comment for everything, and has a true servant's heart.

The seven-year-old who loves the organization of things, will someday be someone's therapist because of his kind soul, and will more than likely be living with us until he is 40 years old.

The five-year-old with the 13-year-old attitude, who has a dictator's personality, asks you to watch her all the time and say "hold on" to keep your attention, and will someday come home on the back of some dude's motorcycle with 10 tatts and a body piercing or two.

The man of the house, the fixer of things, the winner of prizes, and the only person in his family to escape the South.