Monday, April 30, 2007

Please encourage my friend Robin

She NEEDS to be a professional photographer. NEEDS to ...

And this is proof positive why:

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Saturday, April 28, 2007

Daily Docket Doozie

A man was arrested for possession of paraphernalia after police went to a house on a loud party complaint at 11:15 p.m. Thursday. The man was charged after he came out of the home to talk to police with a joint behind his ear. Officers also found a pot pipe in the residence.


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Friday, April 27, 2007

Why the difference?

A month or so ago, Ace and the Queen got all dressed up for their Friday night date ... the Father/Daughter Dance at the Queen's school. Ace was wearing a nice suit, and the Queen looked very pretty in a sweater set and skirt. Ace informed me that the girls were all dressed to the nines. Then I was informed that the Queen had ditched her date to help the janitor clean the bathrooms.

This evening, the Man and I have our date. Do we get to dress up nicely? Do we get to don our dress and khaki pants and nice button-down shirt?

No. We have been charged with a "theme." A Sports theme. Pick your favorite sports team, and wear their apparel.

Ask the Man who his favorite sports team is. I dare ya!

You will receive the response of a blank stare, and then a feeble answer-question "UK?"

Now isn't that a crock? The father/daughter relationship is viewed as this beautiful thing ... a special little relationship that is all about roses and frilly dresses and trips to the local ice cream establishment.

My relationship with my son has been whittled down to spitting, jocks straps, and scratching their crotches.



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Thursday, April 26, 2007

No coffee + lost contact = slow start to the day

I have been out of coffee for the past few days. I kept waiting for the Coffee Fairy *AKA Ace* to magically appear with a cup in his hand, having (1) found a secret stash of the good stuff SOMEwhere in the house or (2) made a run to placate the caffeine monster for just one more morning. That didn't happen this morning.

So in lieu of offering my insights and entertaining anecdotes this morning, I decided to buy myself some coffee. Because really ... who wants to hang around with me when I haven't had my coffee and since there are two little people here who don't have the choice of hanging around me, I needed to make the run for Sterling.

I returned, made my coffee, and was just getting ready to get my cup out of the cupboard when the Man approaches and utters those words I hate to hear come out of his mouth:

Mommy ... I lost my contact.

Great. Just great. Doesn't your eyeball KNOW it is time for Mommy's coffee? How DARE your contact just jump out of your eye, unaided I am sure, thereby putting off my trip to Caffeine Nirvana.

So I do what we normally do ... start yelling at every child in the vicinity of where the contact could possibly be to get out of the room and do it quickly. Bless the Man's heart: he wants to help, so he gets down on his hands and knees and tries to look for it. This is a child who has one good eye and one eye that he can't see Jack out of, and blending those two things together just doesn't work well.

We spent the next 20 minutes on the floor, and I finally found it out in the kitchen. Right at the edge of the kitchen floor and the living room. It travelled with him. So we practiced the STOP! EXCLAIM! DROP and FIND! exercise. It is one I need him to learn, and learn well. Especially at $ 200 a pop.

So here I am, with my second cup of coffee almost entirely gone, feeling a little better about the world, thanking my lucky stars as I hear the rain coming down that I chose NOT to take the Monkey out for her little field trip to a park (although the story IS indoors, the trek back there isn't and it is on a slicker than snot wooden walkway that would surely claim me as a victim as least 10 times because I choose to wear my slicker than snot Birks when I go back there).

It seems that eyeballs have been the subject of interest around this household. To answer the questions ...

Yes, the Man was born with cataracts, just like me. And they were in the exact same place on both of our lenses. That is freaky right there. To know that I was carrying an egg around in my body with the propensity for that birth defect, and Ace's sperm decided THAT was the egg it had to impregnate. Ok ... that sounds bad. I LOVE the Man. LOVE LOVE LOVE him. I just didn't want to wish this on a child at all. I think you get my drift. (here is an article about the Man's issues, if you want to read up on it. I have been trying to find an awareness group for this disease, but have been unsuccessful so far).

I had a vitreous detachment, not a retinal detachment. This is what I had suspected. However, I am in a six-week window of risk for a retinal detachment because things have been shaken up in the eyeball.

The floaters when they come out just sit in the eye, Robin. They go nowhere. They remain there. I am sure they dissolve at some point, or I just learn to ignore them. However, these being the new ones and always right there, I see them all the time now. When the doc started shining his extremely bright light in my eye, he exclaimed "WOW! You DO have a lot of floaters in there! WOW!"

Now I am off to finish up some work for the day. I also have a Criminal Law final to write, and get myself prepared to teach Contract Law next month. Oh the joys of teaching ...

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Wednesday, April 25, 2007

The eyes of a 90 year old

When I was born, I had cataracts. These went undetected for 13 years until an eye dr. finally found them to be the cause of my poor vision (and continual deteroriation).

I kept living with them, and finally maxed out the power of contact lens that I was able to wear (-17.5). I wasn't going to wear contacts and glasses. I just couldn't.

So when my eye dr. said that there could be a possibility that I could have almost perfect vision after cataract surgery, I said go for it. And it did get it. It has been a major miracle that I have been able to see as well as I have been.

But that doesn't mean that my eyes are "cured." They are still nearsighted as hell, and I have thin retinas, which makes me more prone to retinal detachment. So anytime I have a new "floater" in my eye, I pay attention. A lot.

Sunday on our way home, I commented that I was looking at a new floater in the repetoire of floaters in my eyes. My left eye, right after cataract surgery, went through what was called a vitreous detachment. That is when the vitreous in your eye decides to shrink up (due to degeneration of the eye) and pull off the back of the retina. Sound pleasant? It is. it starts off with little flashes of light. Then the floaters. And then new floaters. And then floaters on top of floaters. And then little pin pricks of black dots ALL over the vision field. Really a nice experience.

So when I started to see this new floater on Sunday, my senses were heightened. And sure enough ... the flashes started and last night was the night most of the floaters came out. It really is a scary experience because as soon as you think you are finished with one set, the next, more scary set comes and you wonder when it will ever stop. Right now, I am looking through three floaters that are just sitting right there in my vision field, and will more than likely be there for the rest of my life.

In all technical terms, I was born with the eyes of a 60 year old. So technically, these eyeballs should have been dead and buried a while ago.

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Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Stamping ... the next contact sport

Duel to the death. That was what I felt like between two women who were flexing their stamping muscles during my final class on Saturday at CKU.

This is how it went down...

I chose a seat in the middle of the table because I didn't want people hitting me with their belongings as they tried to get past me. I wanted to be that person.

A woman sat down on my right who was with her friend. Another woman sat down on my left who was with noone but herself.

We had a bag of stamps. I am just not a stamp person. There are too many. Too many overwhelming choices out there. I don't collect them just to have them. That would be my mother. If I wanted something, she would probably have it. I just don't make cards. I don't use stamps, unless they are alpha stamps, in my scrapbooking.

We also had a few different colors of stamps. Nothing overwhelming ... just what was needed to finish the four cards we were charged with making.

Then the sh** hit the fan. We had to become As or Bs. Three of us in a row were Bs because of how things worked out. I found the acrylic stamp. No problem. The watercolor crayons were beckoning to the woman on my right.

Can you please pass the crayons (to the woman on my left).
Well, I will be using them.
Well, you aren't using them now. Could you please pass them down?
Once I am finished with them, I will.
Are you talking about these (placing hand on pots)?
NO. THOSE aren't the crayons. THOSE are paint pots. THOSE are the crayons (pointing to the very obvious tin of Stampin' Up crayons).
Oh. Sure. You can have these (passes the tin over).

About three minutes pass by, and the crayons are shared nicely. I get my card finished and just sit there. We were to then move on to the other card that the As were working on. Embossing. Using a heat gun. I KNOW how to do this. I have done this numerous times during my short-lived stamping life. I didn't want to because I just didn't want to do the card. It was ugly and I didn't have any use for it. So I sat there.

Increduously, the lady on my left asks me if I am going to complete the card, and is amazed when I tell her no. Whatever. I was more relaxed than those maniacs were.

Then the butterfly stamp debacle started.

SOMEone placed the WRONG lid on the brown stamp pad. The lid said it was denim blue. It ended up being brown. But this wasn't figured out until the left lady had already stamped her butterfly.

OH NO! THIS isn't the right color!!!! This is BROWN! This is supposed to be BLUE!

She immediately turns around and starts asking people behind us what their stamp pad colors were until she finally found the denim blue.

I said "just pass me the purple ... I'll have a purple butterfly."

Left lady thought that purple was an acceptable replacement, but still wanted that blue, so she turned her cardstock over and stamped again. Fine.

Right lady was amazed at my tag hole punch. It is a little rectangle hole punch that I bought at a Stampin' Up party.

Is this yours or theirs?
May I use it?
Knock yourself out.
Oh. I like this. Where did you get this?
A Stampin' Up party.
Really? I can't find a reliable Stampin' Up representative. And then she proceeds to give me three minutes worth of how unreliable they are, and maybe she will just order from my rep. I wouldn't WISH this woman on my rep.

Five minutes later. ....
May I use your hole punch again? I think it would be perfect for this.
Yes you may.
Where did you say you got this again?
(rolling eyes) Stampin' Up.
Oh ... I just think this is perfect.
Ok ... gotcha. You are having a love affair with my hole punch. I understand. Really, I do. I had a love affair with Tim Holtz's scissors ... so have at it.

The class wound down. I was on edge because everyone was SO intense around me. They HAD to get EVERYthing done in a short amount of time, and I had had three two many classes like this today so I was fried.

Left lady had asked me to pass her something, so I did. She then exclaimed that I was the most laid-back, easy-going individual she had ever met. I didn't know whether I should have taken that as a compliment or a dig. I decided not to analyze it, and I started to leave.

Right lady asked me to take a picture of she and her friend. I said sure. I took the camera, but didn't bother to put my glasses on. I snapped the pic, and from what I could see in my farsightedness, the pic looked fine.

It didn't to her. And she let me know.

Oh ... this is TERRIBLE. Take another one. No please, no thank you, no manners whatsoever.

So I looked at her straight in the face and said...

No. I won't take another picture. You will need to find someone else whose patience you haven't worn thin.


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Monday, April 23, 2007

Fiends and Friends

There are people you can count on to be your friend through thick and thin.

There are also people you can count on to be fiends about something.

My life was filled with both this past weekend, and it was all a wonderful experience.

The fiend part: I know that there are people out there who are PASSIONATE about their craft. I could fall into this category with knitting, I suppose. Would I scream and go crazy over seeing Debbie Stoller? I don't think I would. I probably wouldn't know what she looked like. Vickie Howell, now that might be a different story because she is just too darn cute.

There is this woman ... this woman named Ali. Ali Edwards, to be exact. If you are a scrapper, you know who she is. You either like her style or you don't. She is all about simple things, and finding the beauty in those simple things.

This is where my friend Robin fits in. Robin LOVES Ali. Loves her. Robin considers herself a stalker of Ali. She will be the first to admit it. She is so darn cute about it ... she will be calm on the outside, but I know that she is squirming on the inside when there is an Ali sighting. And Ali knows Robin. She knows Robin because Robin is a very memorable person. Ali also knows Julie because ... well ... if you can't remember Julie, then there's something wrong with you!

So when the two worlds converged on Friday night ... when Ali was actually SITTING at our table, yukking it up with us, my dear friend Robin was probably wanting to jump out of her skin. But she contained herself.

Does this make Robin a fiend about something? I would more than likely lump her in the "fan" not fiend category. This woman has a following, and I don't think I ever appreciated how much of a following she has. Before I met Ali, I would have called Robin a fiend. Now I call Robin a fan of Ali ... one who CAN contain herself even though it is hard to do so.

Now, the Tim Holtz contingency. Man. I can see where that one comes from. He's a cutie, and so funny. And these women in his class ... they practically fall out of their seats to get his attention. They start lining up for his class 30 minutes ahead of time, just to sit in the front row. Ok. Ok. I was in the second row. I admit it. And I told him that I was having a love affair with his scissors. But still ... would I consider myself a self-proclaimed fiend? No.

There were many fiends out there this weekend, and I am just glad that I was labeled a calm, easy-going individual. Probably too much so. But I really don't see why people get their panties in a bind over stamping.

See? We all have our poisons. How we choose them is personal. And the choice is a lot of fun in the making.

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Sunday, April 22, 2007


Update and some pics tomorrow. Too tired right now to think straight, and waiting for the fam to return from their little vacay without Mom.

However, I have determined that I am not the uptight, fanatical beyotch I previously thought I was. Those people were at CKU. I was the relaxed, laid-back, easy-going (a stranger's words, not mine) person there. Well, me and the group I was with. The rest of them... freaks. Ok. Not ALL of them. But it was an intense weekend, and stories will commence tomorrow.


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Wednesday, April 18, 2007

DEtroit ... Here We Come!

Unless Robin and I can hunt down a computer at the hotel (I am sure we will be able to), this will be it until Sunday when we return.

Soak it in, people.

My words ... my thoughts ... my humor.... my ego.

Have a good one! Catch ya on the flip!


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We are the Champions

Ace just won two movie tickets and a gift card to a local ice cream eatery on the radio because he knew that the movie was Armageddon. Or however that is spelled. I didn't think it was ... but it was. And I shoved the phone at him...

And he has a good phone voice... he should be on the radio.

I told you. He wins everything in this household.

We are good to go today. I have to get packed up and get my name on my stuff. I have to go pick up my pictures at Walgreens and run over to Hobby Lobby to get my liquid adhesive ... and some other things.

Kids have their last scheduled two-hour delay today.

And that, ladies and gents, is the update on the boring life of me.


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Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Ace says I need to win this

Ace sent me an email, telling me that I needed to win this Coach bag. It is a fellow Blogger's contest, and she is giving away this darling, oh so me Coach bag and matching sunglasses case.

So I am doing my part and telling you about this cool contest she is running until April 29th. If you want to enter, you need to go to her blog and sign in with her Mr. Linky. So if you are interested, click the above link and it will take you directly to her post.

Good luck .... but not too much because I want that bag! LOL!

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Good morning, sunshine

Guess who is ill? No, not my kids. Not Ace. ME. Me. I am ill. I have a fever, and that all over ooky nasty feeling. It just came on me last night like a ton of bricks during class. I thought it was because I drank a Pepsi since I had weaned myself off of them, and it was a result of the caffeine.

Guess who is supposed to leaving tomorrow night for CKU? Well of course ... that would be ME. But now ... now I have to play it by ear and see if I can even make it because (1) I don't want my friends to get what I have while we are there. That would be completely unfair to them. (2) I don't want to feel like sh** when we are there.

I have no idea where this came from. It was like BAM! Nobody here has had anything.

And then there is that fear that the kids or worse yet Ace will get it while I am gone, ruining their plans to go to GWL.

So I have contacted CKU to see what their policy is if a participant is ill. I am sure they won't believe me, but it isn't like I would lie about this. I am sure they will respond with "well because you didn't cancel by March 16, you lose your money." And if so, I guess so be it. I will play it by ear.

So Robin, Robin, Julie, and Wendy ... you read it here first, ladies. I will see what the day brings.

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Monday, April 16, 2007

Daily Docket Doozie

Yet another fine example of the life in our small town:

A person with a blood alcohol content (BAC) of 0.204 was charged with driving under the influence Saturday after he was noticed driving 10 mph in the 1000 block of North Main Street. He admitted to an officer, "Between you and me, I should have been arrested tonight. I'm pretty drunk."


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Saturday, April 14, 2007

A Typical Conversation at the Hardware House

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Friday, April 13, 2007

Friday's Feast # 8

When you were a child, which crayon color was your favorite?

Pink, I think. I don't know. I was more in love with those smelly markers ... with the little artist man on it holding the pallette. What were those called? My favorite scents were the red and blue (cherry and blueberry).

On a scale of 1 to 10 (with 10 being highest), how likely would you be to change jobs if it required you to move?

Well, it really depends on the job and where I am moving to. Fargo ... a 1. London, England ... a 10.

Take all the numbers in your birthday and your phone number and add them up, one by one. What’s the total?


Main Course
Have you ever “re-gifted” anything? If so, what was it and who did you pass it on to?

I am sure I have, but I can't think of the exact object that I re-gifted.

Name something you need from the store.

Ummm.... groceries.

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Thursday, April 12, 2007

TT #34

This morning is one of those mornings. I have been having a hard time getting up to work, so I am PAINFULLY behind on that. I also have two girls who don't know the concept of sleeping in after they have had a really rowdy night the night before. Add to that a child who decides that it is her duty to wake up her sleeping brother (Thank you SOOO much for that, Monkey), it has already been a great morning, and I have only been awake for 10 minutes. But my mind is going ...

1. When did it get to be the middle of April already? Seriously. Soon it will be May, and then *shudder* June and summer break. Wow.

2. This weekend. WHY does EVERYthing have to happen in one day? Saturday, Queen has soccer pics. Then she has a game at 9:30. I have to be at the church for Kinder Choir rehearsal with the Monkey and the Man from 9 to 10, and the Queen needs to be there from 10 to noon. I can't let her miss the rehearsal because she has a substantial speaking part, and she needs to be there to practice. I'm with Robin. Praying for rain.

3. Speaking of soccer, I have a bone to pick with our soccer association. While I appreciate the fact that they want the kids to look uniform, WHY in the HELL do they have to wear the skimpiest of NASTY polyester jerseys? AND let me tell you ... that little "emblem" will crack and fade with subsequent washings. And some kids will look like crap out there. You should have let us keep up with the tradition of hte hand-me-down soccer shirts. They will look better over time.

4. I have to write a quiz for my one student-class tonight. I also have a speaker coming in to talk to her, along with a few others. Did you know that April is Sexual Assault Awareness Month? Now you do.

5. CKU: I HAVE to prepare. I had a dream that we left and I had NOTHING with me.... no tools, no pictures, no clothes, no NOTHING!

6. My inlaws are coming in this weekend. Yep. Enough said.

7. My family is going to Great Wolf Lodge next weekend while I am away. So I have to get them prepared, meaning I need to get the Queen a new suit. So meant to order one from J Crew. Never got around to it. Bad Mom. Bad, bad Mom. And the only place that I have seen bathing suits is the Walton Trust Fund. Great.

8. Did I mention that I am PAINFULLY behind in work? Yeah. I think I did. And all I want to do is knit and do what I want to do. But I have been down that road so many times I have lost count. Oh yeah... did I mention that I didn't get that job? Nope. Got the email File 13 letter last Friday. But I was going to tell them no anyway. Seriously. I was. Honestly.<9>We have to finish the cars for the youngers production this Sunday. But let me tell you ... Sunday at 12:30 will be a GOOD time of the day, because both performances will be O.V.E.R.

10. I need to get some pictures taken of my knitting, my yarn, me knitting my yarn, and then 3 1" black and white pictures for a CKU class. I guess the first thing to do is see where I can get that done.

11. I have to make a decision about the Monkey's preschool situation next year. While the little school is wonderful where she goes now, they have no room in their 4 and 5 year old class. And the teacher suggested that I *hold her back* in the 3 YO class, no matter the fact that she will be turning four in June. So she will be FOUR in a THREE year old class. No thanks. I appreciate that you don't want to lose my money, but I won't hold my kid back just because the 4 and 5 YO class filled up quickly. Montessori is a huge consideration right now. I think she would fare wonderfully there, plus her little friend, Abby, will be there.

12. My mother, sister, and I need to decide if we are going to go out on the craft show "circuit" this summer. I have applied for a vendor's license, but haven't heard anything back about that. And my mother asks me about it, every time she sees me. EVERY time. I'm about ready to send her to Columbus with a note in her hand...

13. Need to finish a pair of shorts for a customer before we leave next week. Yes, BEFORE we leave. That means I need to get four days worth of work done in these next two days.... HA! That should be a sight to behold. My suggestion, people ... stay away from my house for the next seven days. After that, it's all fair game.

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

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Wednesday, April 11, 2007

Back to the old grind

All the kids went back to school yesterday, hence the lack of a post. I wasn't prepared. I wasn't ready to give up my "don't have anywhere to go" attitude. I actually WANTED another day of Spring Break. Can you believe it? Neither can I.

We have one more practice for our Kinder Choir kids tonight, and then a performance on Sunday that should prove to be the best entertainment in town. Literally. These kids are so far from prepared for this presentation. I think there are too many words in the songs for these little ones. They like the songs where they have cute little moves. Other than that, they are lost most the time, or going to the bathroom. This group of kids (mine included, mind you) are the most regular group of kids you will EVER meet. We have this one little boy who poops at 6:20. On the dot. No joke. The only time he hasn't was when he wasn't there.

Then there are the kids who haven't been there for ... oh .... the entire spring season who just show up. Hello.... you are either in or you're out.

We have these two girls who could pass as twins who are thick as thieves. They love to sit next to one another, even if they aren't supposed to. They have these blonde curls and cute little smiles that have apparently gotten them far in their four years here on earth.

Then we have a brother and sister duo. Man alive ... they are only one year apart, and they are slick as snot. The little girl can get her pout on in about .00000000001 seconds flat, and it has worked for others before so she keeps doing it. It doesn't work with me, however and she knows it. The brother .... wow. Just wow. He throws a mini fit every time he doesn't get what he wants. He has gum in his mouth about 75 percent of the time, and I WISH his mother would be a responsible parent and have him throw it out before he comes in. Because I always have to be the one to have him deposit it in the trashcan upon his arrival. And then he throws his fit. And then he is a grump. And then he gets over it, until someone else pi**es him off, starting the cycle all over again. And don't get me started on when he can't go with his sister to her little kid's club (they can't handle them together, but WE have to ....)

And then there is this little girl who looks a LOT like the Monkey ... she just gets all pouty when she doesn't want to sing. She only wants to do what she wants to do when she wants to do it. She must get that from her father. I must talk to her mother ...


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Sunday, April 08, 2007

A Sign From Above

This morning, we had our Easter services. I had a solo. Yes ... me... the one who complains about not getting solos. I had one. It was brief, but it was there and I was ready to Tear. It. Up.

So I am singing away in the first service, and I thought that the choir anthem was more toward the middle of the service. The director starts waving his arms, and this really familiar music starts playing.

Me: La dee da. Hmm... where did Ace say he put my purse? Where ARE my parents? I can't find them in here at ALL and if they miss my sol.... WTH? Is THAT my music? Oh SH** it is.

Now. That was the inward discussion. The outward appearance was one of bliss, and then it was this:

So I about fell down off of the step, tried to non-chalantly, but hurriedly make it to the mike stand, and my director was kind enough to reach in and hand me my mike. And then I was off and singing. So I didn't really have a lot of time to get too nervous.

I went to sit with my parents afterwards, and asked my mother how it sounded. The Mominator, in her true style, said "well, your notes were dead-on, but you were WAY too loud. Do you think that you can hold the microphone down a little bit when you sing the next time?"

Me: Well no, Mominator. That isn't MY job. That is the guy in the sound booth's job to mix the mike in with the rest of the stuff. Go talk to him.

So I go into the second service, knowing exactly where I was supposed to sing, and was ready to do it. I walked up with confidence, grabbed my mike, and decided to check to see if it was on. Sure enough, it wasn't. But there are only sixteen measures in a fast 4/4 time to try to turn that puppy on, and when it wasn't turning on, I calmy handed it to my director, and started singing sans mike.

He got it turned on for me and handed it back, smooth as silk.

So there are a few theories: (1) it was the diva soprano who turned it off (who had the mike beforehand), (2) it magically turned off on its own, or (3) it was my mother. I was voting for # 3. It turned out to be # 1.

BUT here's the lesson learned in this little story: as much as I have bad-mouthed my director in times past, he was right there to help me. So I needed to learn that life's lesson. And it was also God's way of showing me that He has a sense of humor.

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Friday, April 06, 2007

Friday Feast


When you travel, which mode of transportation do you prefer?

I suppose car. I used to love to fly until I had kids, and then I realized my own mortality. I haven't flown too much since I started having kids.


Have you ever met a blogging friend in person?

Well, one of my really good friends is a blogger ... does that count? Shout out to Miss Robin. In fact, I am friends with some bloggers, but the friendship came first.


When was the last time you were really, really tired?

Ummmm.... yesterday?

Main Course

If you could have dinner with any one fictional character from a book or movie, who would it be?

Indiana Jones, baby. And not the 65 year old version, either. The 1980s version of him.


Fill in the blank: One day, I hope to see _______________.

One day, I hope to see the happiness of all of my children in their adult lives.

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Thursday, April 05, 2007

Lack of creativity this morning

So no TT for me today. Just lacking creativity and why force it, right? And this is a later-than-normal entry for me anyway. I have been using all of my brain power trying to maintain my sanity this week of Spring Break.

So I have Queen in her room, allegedly "cleaning" it. The Monkey is now Addicted to Pippi Longstocking. Not the original. A cheesy remake. But hey, it seriously has given me an opportunity to take a shower without having to worry that the Monkey is burning the house down.

So Pippi was playing in the room, and Queen was feigning a weak attempt at looking like she was cleaning. I was back here in my room, working. Then all of a sudden ... I hear this BLOODcurdling scream. From the Queen.

Mommy!!!! You need to get in here!! NOW!!!!!!! It is REALLY bad, Mommy!!!

I'm thinking: the Monkey is lying in a pool of blood; the Monkey is hanging off of the top bunk, lifeless; the Monkey is in some death-situation that the Queen put her in.

I jump up, knock my chair over, RUN out into the hallway, about inflict mortal wounds on my middle child because he was in the way, all the while yelling "WHAT IS IT??????" and she just kept screeching "GET IN HERE!! IT'S BAD!!!!"

DAMN it if it wasn't a freaking SPIDER on her CEILING!!!!

I started crying. Literally, I stood there and started sobbing.

I had to go into the kitchen so I wouldn't freak out the other two. I didn't care if I freaked out the 8 1/2 year old child who knows SOOOOO much better than to act that way over an arachnid.

Needless to say, when she tried to apologize to me, I told her to give me my space and leave me alone. She stayed away from me pretty much all day long.

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Wednesday, April 04, 2007

Wordless Wednesday

One of those mornings....


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Tuesday, April 03, 2007


Queen gets invited to other people's houses for playdates more often than she invites people over here.

And I am starting to feel guilty.

Starting. Not all the way there yet.

Yesterday, the girl across the street from us called to invite Queen over for a while. When I came home from class, I looked up at their house and had that Mommy instinct kick in, and I knew my child was in that house, sleeping over. And sure enough, she was.

They have a huge house. They only have two girls ... twins. I mean, this house is really big. And then there are other friends who have huge houses and are either only children, or the youngest of a much older sibling.

My house ... just is NOT conducive to playdates. It really isn't. It is stretching it to have the five of us in here, let alone an extra person or two. When it has to be done, I do it. But when it is voluntary, I am SO not on top of things, offering to have people over.

I DO need to invite one of the Man's friends this week, though just so he has someone over. And I don't mind that so much. If that one turns into a sleepover, that is ok because the Man has his own room, and he actually keeps it CLEAN. The girls room looks like five world wars have been waged in there on a daily basis. It just does not stay clean. EVER.

And there are two girls in that room. If the Queen ever had a sleepover, someone would have to be displaced from a room. No ifs, ands, or buts about it.

So I will continue to live in the beginnings of my guilt-ridden feelings, but I don't think they will ever escalate into full-blown guilt. I remember spending the night a LOT at friend's houses, but I do not remember at all them spending the night at mine. I think I had one sleepover, and I remember it being with more than one person, and my mother's nerves were frazzled the next morning.

So I guess I attribute this to my mother...

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Monday, April 02, 2007

My Old Kentucky Home

I was a high school rah rah, and I never even gave college cheerleading a thought because I didn't have any tumbling in my repetoire.

In this part of the country, when you say the word Kentucky, you think of a few things: horses, beautiful country, basketball, and, believe it or not, cheerleading.

You see, my alma mater, the University of Kentucky, has won the national championship FIFTEEN times. They are a powerhouse in college cheering. Seriously. They really ARE good. And they don't have reps. Or at least I don't think they have reputations.

And the high schools in Lexington are just as competitive. Paul Laurence Dunbar HS, as well as Tates Creek, and outerlying high schools are rabid beasts when it comes to cheering.

And apparently, some television producers have tapped into that market.... the Kentucky cheerleader.

Cheer U is the newest installment, and I *think* it is on Bravo, but don't quote me. Ace and I watch it not for its content, but to see the scenes of the campus, reliving our glorious years on that campus.

And really ... they were glorious. Here's where I get all nostalgic on your butts....

It is a wonderful school, and secretly I will be depressed with a capital D if ONE of these kids doesn't choose it. It is my plan to move back down there someday because I love the area. It holds a lot of memories for Ace and I. For now, we are in a good area. I don't think I would want to raise small children there, just because I don't know a lot about their primary school system.

Because let's face it, when I mentioned those images when you hear the word Kentucky, education isn't on the top of the list. They are getting better, but not a lot.

Where was I ... oh yeah. Cheerleading. If you ever get a chance to catch an episode, it might be worth your time. Or not.

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The Lovely She, that is me!

I'm a mom of three peeps ... Queen Bee, The Door Man, and the Chandelier Monkey, and wife to Ace, the Helpful Hardware Man. I created this space to get away from the people known as my inlaws, and because life with three kids and a hubby is all Unexplored Territory.

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The nine-year-old who seems to be growing older every minute, has an opinion and a comment for everything, and has a true servant's heart.
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The seven-year-old who loves the organization of things, will someday be someone's therapist because of his kind soul, and will more than likely be living with us until he is 40 years old.
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The five-year-old with the 13-year-old attitude, who has a dictator's personality, asks you to watch her all the time and say "hold on" to keep your attention, and will someday come home on the back of some dude's motorcycle with 10 tatts and a body piercing or two.

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The man of the house, the fixer of things, the winner of prizes, and the only person in his family to escape the South.

Retiring the Blog
A Blast from the Past
Just nothing today ....
Move over, Mom
Because life wasn't exciting enough....
Mystic Pizza
Starting off on the wrong foot
A convo at our house
My 6 am dreams
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