Monday, June 12, 2006

Cars + 3 year old = Disaster

Like any good mother, I like to entertain my children. Oh, do you want to play with my kidney now? Let me saw it out for you ... hold on ... ok, here you go, honey. Have fun!

I decided that it would be good for me to take the three kids to see a movie today. We have had these passes that I won on our local radio station for being a loyal listener. I am SUCH a loyal listener that I didn't even listen to when they drew my name, so I had NO idea I had won. Ace, on the other hand, checked and saw that I was a weiner.

So, these passes have been sitting on the fridge, just waiting for that right moment. And today, I thought, was just that right moment.

I decided on Over the Hedge.

Word to the wise: when you have a gut feeling, go with it. Don't change your mind because it will only be the wrong choice in the end.

I tell the kids that we are going to see a movie, and immediately the older two start jumping around, wanting to know which one we were going to see. I told them Over the Hedge, and they were in agreement. The Chandelier Monkey, on the other hand, was so dazed and confused by this concept of a movie that all I heard was "Monkey go to movie ... I not scared ... not too loud ... no Hot Dog Man there." You see, the Monkey was traumatized the other night when we ventured into our local hot dog joint, and there was an 8 foot hot dog, dressed in ketchup AND mustard, standing right next to her. I don't think her little fingernails could get any whiter as she gripped onto that table for dear life.

I feed the kids and get them in the van. The Door Man wants to know if Chicken Little or Narnia will be playing, so that tells you when the last time it was that we graced the doorway of the theater.

On our way into the theater, there is a change of plans, and we decide on Cars.

We get our tickets, and bless the cashier's heart, she looked past the fact that the Monkey could have been a paying individual. It is a good thing because ...

The Monkey sat through the first FIVE minutes of the movie.

She was up. She was down. She was out of her chair. She was folded up in her chair. She was on the floor. She was taking off her shoes. She was trying to escape down the other way where her older sibs were. She asked me 4000 times "what's that?" pointing to the EXACT same space on the wall. It's a wall. It's a speaker. It's a light. It's the Queen of England. It's Joe Cocker's face. None of those answers appeased her.

About half-way through the movie, and at about the point where I had 2 minutes of patience left, the Door Man exclaims "This sure is a LONG movie! When's it gonna be over?"

Not soon enough, Door Man. Not soon enough. I am most certain that had we stuck to my original plan, and seen Over the Hedge, the movie would have only seemed like 4 hours instead of the 8 hours it took to watch Cars.

And the next time I decide to take the Monkey to a movie, the Hot Dog Man is coming with.


Anonymous RobinPowell said...

Sweet look woman! Loving your new blog! We opted for over the hedge..perfect amount of time 1.5 hours.
I hate movies, I hate to play.

7:48 AM  
Anonymous Jacque said...

hey girl like your new look....I love the it's "Joe Cocker's face." Yeah little ones and movies not good. We tried to take Jon to Finding Nemo when it came out and he cried after the previews were over to go the lobby to play on the video games. nice talk later

9:26 AM  

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The Lovely She, that is me!

I'm a mom of three peeps ... Queen Bee, The Door Man, and the Chandelier Monkey, and wife to Ace, the Helpful Hardware Man. I created this space to get away from the people known as my inlaws, and because life with three kids and a hubby is all Unexplored Territory.

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The nine-year-old who seems to be growing older every minute, has an opinion and a comment for everything, and has a true servant's heart.
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The man of the house, the fixer of things, the winner of prizes, and the only person in his family to escape the South.

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And the walls came tumbling down
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Good f'ing riddance, my arch nemesis!


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