Wednesday, March 28, 2007

TT # 33



Yes. It is true. I am of the legal profession. Although I don't talk about it much, I must come forth and admit it all here...

One of the things we loved to do in law school was listen to bad lawyer jokes ... you know the ones ... why don't sharks eat lawyers? professional courtesy. But the best ones were hearing about the awful lawsuits that were brought, or the questions that have been asked that should never have even been put on ANY record.

In honor of my profession, I bring you

Thirteen Funny Things In Which the Lawyers Looked Like Idiots!


1. Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, in most cases he just passes quietly away and doesn't know anything about it until the next morning?

2. Q: What happened then?
A: He told me, he says, "I have to kill you because you can identify me."
Q: Did he kill you?

3. Was it you or your brother that was killed in the war?

4. The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he?

5. Q: She had three children, right?
A: Yes.
Q: How many were boys?
A: None.
Q: Were there any girls?

6. Were you alone or by yourself?

7.Q: I show you Exhibit 3 and ask you if you recognize that picture?
A: That's me.
Q: Were you present when that picture was taken?

8. Q: You say that the stairs went down to the basement?
A: Yes.
Q: And these stairs, did they go up also?

9. Q: Do you know how far pregnant you are now?
A: I'll be three months on March 12th.
Q: Apparently then, the date of conception was around January 12th?
A: Yes.
Q: What were you doing at that time?

10. Do you have any children or anything of that kind?

11. Was that the same nose you broke as a child?

12. Q: Mrs. Jones, do you believe you are emotionally stable?
A: I used to be.
Q: How many times have you committed suicide?

13.You don't know what it was, and you didn't know what it looked like, but can you describe it?




Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!


The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!









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13 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm laughing and shaking my head. LOL Great TT. The best so far. :) You have my vote!

12:08 AM  
Blogger Raggedy said...

Hahaha!
I have seen most of these before but a good laugh is always worth another go.
Terrific Thursday Thirteen!
My TT is posted.
Have a wonderful day!
Happy TT'ing!
*^_^
(=':'=)
(")_ (")Š
Raggedy

1:03 AM  
Blogger Marie said...

did those people really pass the Bar Exams? :) :) :) very funny list!!! great one!!!

2:28 AM  
Blogger Tink said...

*LOL* GREAT list! The legal profession is one to be proud of, very interesting.
My T13 is about posts without comments.

4:54 AM  
Blogger Carmen said...

he he. why is it we love laughing at lawyers?

7:16 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

love this! Do you think that there are some social worker jokes somewhere?
Happy Thursday girl!

7:19 AM  
Blogger Taoknitter said...

Fantastic stuff! Thanks for sharing it!

8:46 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

hilarious. I'm glad you can laugh at your profession.

I'd only seen a couple of these, I'm passing this along to my uncle, he takes the bar exam soon.

11:15 AM  
Blogger Chelle said...

Ha! Awesome!

1:05 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Those are absolutely priceless! I'm practically crying from laughing. And you know they were trying to be all SuperLawyer at the time they said those things.

2:53 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I must be really tired because some of them actually seems logical to me. LOL!

4:01 PM  
Blogger Denise Patrick said...

Oh, yes. I've seen way too many of these!! (we lawyers are crazy about showing these to each other) One of my favorites is #9 - because the date of conception should be DECEMBER, not January!!

5:17 PM  
Blogger Mamacita Tina said...

Crack me up! These are great!

7:44 PM  

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