Sunday, June 25, 2006
Five Appropriate Topics for Sermons During a Family Service (AKA Where they torture parents and don't offer kids Sunday School classes during service)
- Noah. Nothing can really go wrong with talking about a man who saved mankind and the animals because ... you know .. we all love mankind and animals.
- Moses. He gave us the 10 Commandments. Kids might not like them, but we parents sure do, especially that "honor thy father and thy mother" entry. Right on!
- Jesus. Really, he should be number one, and the Lutheran part of me feels guilty for not putting him first. But I am lazy, so I am leaving him here. Christmas and even Easter are great kids topics.
- Adam and Eve. They LOVE that creation stuff. There are some really neat songs that could be worked into the sermon, if need be. You know, keep those kids involved and listening.
- Esther. Yeah, I know. Esther didn't have a good life, and the thing she was asked to do really could have cost her her life, but she stood up, she was strong, and she royally kicked rear.
Inappropriate Topic for Family Service (AKA: Where the parents wish they could have sent their kids out to the lobby during this portion of the sermon).
Auschwitz. Seriously. Really, what preschooler and grade schooler needs to know that the crematoriums worked 24 hours a day, and in one 24 hour period, thousands of Jews were cremated. And then, really ... the Starvation Chamber. Talking about bowels drying up and brains shriveling while the person was still alive.
When the first grader behind me says "oh Mommy ... that is GROSS!", I think a line might have been overstepped. Thankfully, my kids were too involved in the 10000 coloring books and crayons they brought with them to church, and had already ground up enough Goldfish in the carpet to keep the custodian busy, vowing to never AGAIN allow the church to hold a Family Service as long as he was sweeping the floors. Thankfully, my first grader was obliviously coloring.
And don't even ask me WHERE this fit in. It was some harrowing story about a man who offered to take another man's place in the Starvation Chamber, and yes ... there was a tie-in to Jesus.
But really, next time, Pastor: Show a Veggie Tales movie. They have a good one on Esther.
I'm a mom of three peeps ... Queen Bee, The Door Man, and the Chandelier Monkey, and wife to Ace, the Helpful Hardware Man. I created this space to get away from the people known as my inlaws, and because life with three kids and a hubby is all Unexplored Territory.
The nine-year-old who seems to be growing older every minute, has an opinion and a comment for everything, and has a true servant's heart.
The seven-year-old who loves the organization of things, will someday be someone's therapist because of his kind soul, and will more than likely be living with us until he is 40 years old.
The five-year-old with the 13-year-old attitude, who has a dictator's personality, asks you to watch her all the time and say "hold on" to keep your attention, and will someday come home on the back of some dude's motorcycle with 10 tatts and a body piercing or two.
The man of the house, the fixer of things, the winner of prizes, and the only person in his family to escape the South.
Coddled Customers, or Why I Would Never Make a Goo...
Godspeed, little bird
The Friday Five
Would you like some spray with that?
Seriously ... does she have children?
Yeah... ok.. but what do they DO?
Baptizing the bathroom
.....light the corner of my mind ....