Unexplored Territory

Monday, October 30, 2006

Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon

I am the *self-professed* champion of the Six Degees of Kevin Bacon. You know the one: where someone shouts out, at let's say three o'clock in the morning at a scrapbook retreat, the name of an actor or an actress, and you are required to link that actor or actress to Kevin Bacon.

The rules were bent a little for me, especially when someone told me to attempt to link Clark Gable to Kevin Bacon. I can't remember if I did it or not.

The key is: you get him linked through either A Few Good Men or JFK. There were star-studded casts in both of those movies, and if you can get a link to Kevin Costner, Tom Hanks, or Tom Cruise, you are GOLDEN.

So ... try me. Tell me someone, and I will put it in my Thursday 13 this week. That will be a fun one. If you don't give me someone, I will ask the IRL people around me. I PROMISE that I will not cheat and look on the Internet. I will have Ace attest to my honesty. Promise. I have played this game with him at 2 in the morning when we can't get to sleep and we have run out of television theme songs to sing and bug the crap out of one another with.

So back to Clark Gable... let's see if I can do it.

1. Clark Gable to Vivien Leigh in Gone With the Wind (because I do not know of any other CG movies)
2. Vivien Leigh to Marlon Brando in A Streetcar Named Desire (don't ask HOW I remember this one!)
3. Marlon Brando to Val Kilmer in that GOSH-FORSAKEN horrid movie of The Island of Dr. Moreau .... shudder
4. Val Kilmer to Tom Cruise in Top Gun (see it ALL boils down to those biggies)
5. Tom Cruise to Kevin Bacon in A Few Good Men

I think that is how I did it at Crop a Doodle Do... or maybe I cheated and went through television to get there. I can't remember.

So ... try me. And I will put it in my TT for this week.

Being a Kid

After having been told that we just don't have the funds for me to have made this trip this coming weekend with my scrapbook sisters (the ones you can bust a gut with time and time again, until you get to the point where you are BEGGING for the laughter to stop because you aren't feeling so good... the ones you have never met before, or have known for a relatively short period of time but it feels like a lifetime that you have known them), I have decided that sometimes it is just much nicer being a kid.

Sure. You have to face the upcoming teenage years. But we didn't know about them then. We just went with the flow. We didn't anticipate what would happen to us.

We rode our bikes all over the place without a care in the world.

We roller skated to our heart's content.

We didn't have to worry about what was for dinner. We only had to worry that it would be something we liked.

We didn't have to worry about making bill payments, or buying groceries on a budget. We just ate what was in the house, and consumed what was around us because we had no clue.

We played with our friends and didn't worry that someone else had more money than we did. That just meant they had the cooler toys.

We watched Saturday Morning cartoons with no reserve ... our parents could trust the content in them.

We went to school to have fun and learn. It was never a chore.

Recess time was the most liberating part of our day.

School programs were about presidents and animals and we sang cute little finger play songs.

We recited the Pledge of Allegiance by rote, never really understanding the price that was, and still is, paid for our freedom and ability to recite that Pledge.

In so many ways, adults look back to those times of childhood and wish that we could go back. Wish we could return with the knowledge that we have now and relive those years, fully appreciating what we had when we had it.

As I listen to the laughter of my youngest two children playing with water and soap in the bathroom sink, I relive those moments, and I savor every sight and every sound that is emitted in this house.

Because I am reliving my childhood ... just through my children's eyes.

Sunday, October 29, 2006

The Brownies need your help!

AKA: What craft can I do with the Bee's Brownie troop this week?

They are going for a Try It Badge on healthy eating, so I have to compile a trail mix concept for the girls for their snacks.

But I also have to come up with the craft. Can you think of anything can tie healthy foods into a craft?

I found this, and it looks really cute, but they won't be dry in time for the girls to take them home.

Or there is this and I could do all the apple prep beforehand.

Any other ideas out there? I remember doing the dried apple craft when I was growing up and it was fun and interesting. I want them to know how to do the drying, so maybe I could bring in a sample.

So .. have at it. Other ideas are greatly appreciated. I only have a short amount of time with them, and if I see another foam magnet or book mark come home with my kid, I will scream.

Friday, October 27, 2006

Oh you Star Wars geeks

Check this out...

Such wonderful memories. And I realized that I was a spoiled brat when I was growing up because I had about ALL of that stuff.

Now ... I do have a beef. I had the Princess Leia Barbie-sized action figure.. the one that had synthetic hair.

These directions.... SUCKED ARSE!

You could NOT put her hair back in those buns. It was physcially impossible. So my Leia ... she had long brown hair and no longer looked authentic.

But guess who I still have in my possession...

Him.

I remember looking in the bottom of our closet when I was seven or eight ... right before Christmas. I remember finding all three of them ... shiny and new in their boxes.

And I remember, like a moron, spilling it to my Mom that I found them.... and then tried to back-peddle like I hadn't seen them.

Yeah. Proud moment right there.

Memories from childhood

Raising my children in my hometown is really a dream come true for me. The Queen and Man are at that age where I started having my memories of this town, of my parents, and of the experiences I had.

I remember spending a whole summer on roller skates.

I went from these:

To these:

We had a really cool roller rink .. Ohio Skate. It was THE place to be, skating to "Somebody's Gonna Hurt Someone" ... or something like that. I never mastered skating backwards. I tried. Many times. And fell down. Many times. But I LOVED to skate.

I had two friends in my neighborhood who I played with constantly. The boy was all of three years old, and he was smarter than a whip. Looking back on that now, I marvel at the fact that a six year old sought out a three year old for entertainment. But we were steadfast friends.

We played Star Wars. We had lightsabers. We were cool. We thought we looked like this:

But I am sure we looked more like this:

The three of us were inseparable for what seemed like ages (when it was probably just a few years) until Anna, my girl friend, moved to the other side of town.

I think Anna moved because I hit her over the head with one of these on our way home from school because she wouldn't let me be Princess Leia:

I told you I liked Star Wars.

Thursday, October 26, 2006

Why it sucks to be my manager right now...

He was going to take a few vacation days today and tomorrow.

Instead, look what he got to deal with today!

This isn't a pic he took ... but this is where he lives in Colorado Springs. Niiiiiice.

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

TT # 16

I am SOOO not a planner. I can't stand to think of things ahead of time, and then I can't stand myself when I get down to the last minute and have to come up with so
mething. I JUST came up with the Monkey's Halloween costume YESTERDAY. Yes. Yesterday. I told you ... not a planner.

My mother and I were talking yesterday about the possibilities, and how she always hated it when she told me to pick out what I wanted to be for that year. It always had to have a tail. Didn't matter what it was, as long as it had a tail, I was happy. One year, I was a mouse. The next year, I was a Siamese cat. I tried to get the Pink Panther out of her (she sewed all of my costumes) but I was not successful in the endeavor.

Then my mother said "well you could send them as two tree and the Man could be MacBeth." Or Hamlet ... or something. You Shakespereans can explain that one to me later. She commented that she was always ahead of her time when it came to Halloween costumes. She dressed my brother as Friar Tuck when he was in the fifth grade. She used a stocking and had a piece of flesh colored felt on it, and shoved it down over his head. I am certain my brother was mortified, wandering the halls of Lincoln Elementary in that getup.

So here are....

Thirteen Costumes I Thought About For the Kids For Halloween1. Napoleon Dynamite for the Door Man

2. Deb for Queen Bee

3. Pedro for the Monkey

4. A punk rocker for QB

5. A University of Ketucky cheerleader (this is a go for QB)

6. A scarecrow (a go for the Man)

7. A University of Kentucky football player (still up in the air on the Monkey ... yeah. TorT is Thursday night)

8. A fairy for the Monkey

9. A monkey ... for the Monkey

10. Cat in the Hat (the leftover cotume from last year for the Man; I was surprised that he said no)

11. Mork and Mindy .... for the older two, but wasn't sure what we could have done with the Monkey. We love themes at our house.

12. A Tbird and Two Pink Ladies. That might be next year's theme

13. Well .. I ran out of ideas. So only 12. Maybe you can give me an idea of what I should do next year.

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WW # 3 - Llama Love

Tuesday, October 24, 2006

Mmmm.... good!

The kids and Ace went to our town's Halloween parade tonight. They came home with quite the loot. Well, the girls did. The Door Man decided that he would complain more than any woman on the face of this earth combined, so he didn't get much candy. And he went to bed early.

But here's a little conversation from the night. Is it verbatim? Heck no. I have no idea how the conversation went, but I could only imagine it sounded a little like this.

QB: Hey Daddy..... what's this?

Ace: Not sure. What does it look like?

QB: Some new fangled, dog-bone shaped candy I guess.

Ace: Well, there's only one way to find out!

QB: There sure is Daddy. Cheers!

CRUNCH!

YUCK!

When you receive a bag of goodies with these things included, and a business card from Howl A Day Inn, a dog grooming shop, it is a sure bet that it isn't candy.

And who would you blame ... yourself or the manufacturer?

Ace and I were watching tv the other night, and a commercial from Lexus came on. It was a view of a steering wheel, and a shot of the car parking itself.

I had heard of this technology, but didn't think that it was ready to hit the American streets yet. Apparently it is just around the corner.

Lexus has its version, as does Toyota.

But my question is this:

When your computer malfunctions because the parking assistant sensor did not properly calculate the distance between the car behind you and your car, who will be cited? You? Or Toyota?

And have we really become SO lazy that we need to have a car do all the parking?

In Ohio, we are not required to parallel park for our driving test, but we do need to go through a pylon obstacle course, which resembles parallel parking. I think it is the only way that the State Highway Patrolmen can handle all those driving tests so they don't have to endure the rush of adrenaline every time a 16 year old is charged with parallel parking on Main Street, USA.

But now, can an insolent teenager look the driving instructor/test giver in the eye and say "sure I'll parallel park the car ... let me set up my computer, dude."

So ... who passes the test? The car?

I am sure that states will have to re-write some legislature to make certain that the driving portion of the test needs to be 100 percent completed by a human.

Of course, I was the one who kept saying that when I learned to drive, all I would have to do was push a button and wait for the car to drive itself.

It might not be that close, but it is getting there.

Welcome to Ghost Works

Say hello to my new renter, Ghost Works! Such a fun blog!!!! Please check it out by clicking on the thumbnail to your right.

Monday, October 23, 2006

You take the high road and I'll take the low road

Back in July, I talked about my Mortal Enemy. She was someone I knew growing up, and she is still the same person today that she was 30 some years ago. But now, I can call her a frigid bitch, because that is exactly what she is to me. To this day, I have NO idea what it is about me that just riles her.

So Ace told me to take the high road on this subject, and I complied. For two whole days. Really, two and a HALF days. But it is coming out now.

Saturday was the last day of soccer games for the fall season. Thank goodness as the air has turned to spitting rain/snow, and frigid temperatures. And to end the season, we played the Moral Enemy's son's team. His name is Blake. And of course it is, really. Blake Anthony, to be exact.

Now, Blake Anthony was out on the field, playing his little heart out. He really WAS trying. His dad, who used to be Ace's boss, was yelling at him from the sideline. And not from his chair, mind you. He would follow him up and down the field.

Get it, Blake. Come on! Get it!!!! Kick the ball!!!! BLAKE ANTHONY!!!!!

I really felt sorry for the kid because it really didn't call for pulling out the big guns and using the middle name.

Mortal Enemy sat in her chair and barely moved her lips. I think it was more out of disgust than anything because she didn't want to lay claim to the kid who was OBVIOUSLY not playing to his six-year-old potential out there on the field.

So it was with great joy that MY son, the one who has been loping up and down the soccer field since the games started in September, never getting himself into the thick of things, actually getting into the thick of things. He was aggressive. He was running after the ball. He was all over the place. AND....

HE SCORED A GOAL!!!!!!!!

I became one of those mothers, as Ace pointed out to me. But I was excited! I had to let it be known that that was MY son who scored that goal. That was MY son who kept at it and finally got in there.

I didn't notice the Mortal Enemy doing any cartwheels.

Pets

Over the years, we have had a cat or two. When we started off our marriage, Ace and I had a black and white cat named Sylvester. Before kids, Sylvester was our child. When he was diagnosed with hypertrophic cardiomyopathy (heart failure), it felt like my world was crumbling. Seriously. And when we had to put him to sleep, I was beside myself with grief. I carried on for DAYS. My mother was quite disappointed with me, mumbling things like "you wait until you have a child in peril ... THEN you will know what true heartache is."

And she was right. Because seriously, he was a cat. But he was near and dear to my heart, and we had invested so much time and money in his medications and treatments that it felt like we had been robbed of time with him.

Then came Luke and Leia, our Himalayans. Brother and sister, named after the infamous brother and sister team of the Star Wars saga, they were quite the pair. We had them until we moved back to my home town, and then my mother had to take care of them because we were living (for the time being) with my elderly aunt. We ended up selling them because we didn't know when we would be able to get into a house, and my mother just does NOT do indoor pets, especially ones that come with a litterbox. She felt extremely guilty after we sold them. I never consoled her on those feelings because she was the one who forced the issue.

We have had three cats and one dog since then. One cat we had to immediately take back to the Humane Society because she bit the Queen when the Queen was just a toddler. The second cat we gave away because he had fleas ... We couldn't keep him out of our crawl space, and he would bolt out the door at a moment's notice. We just HATE fleas (don't know of anyone who loves them) and when you see a flea on your child's arm, that is the last straw.

Then we got our last cat, Ra. He was a good cat, but he was a barn cat. I would always say "you can take the cat out of the barn, but can't take the barn out of the cat." And the older he got, the worse he acted around the kids. He would lie in wait in the hallway, and when an unsuspecting child would come down the hallway, he would pounce on them, attach himself to their leg, and then bite them. So Ra was banished to the basement where, like Jake, he decided the crawl space was a cool place. And then the fleas started. So we got him all cleaned up, and gave him away.

In between there, we had a dog. A 10-year old Golden, given to us by a lady who just didn't have the time to invest in him anymore. Goldens are awesome dogs, but they are pretty set in their ways when they hit 10. And he had been around kids, but not all the time. So by the time that the dog bit the Door Man on the bridge of his nose, barely missing his eye, we found a new place for Simba.

There are times when I feel bad that the kids don't have a dog. We will not be getting any more cats as the Monkey has some asthma problems that pop up. Ever since we got rid of Ra, we have barely had to give her any breathing treatments.

So we will just grin and bear the comments that the kids make when they come home from sleepovers or birthday parties or playdates about how Susie has three dogs and Billy has two cats. Because, really, we just don't do pets.

Sunday, October 22, 2006

All we were missing was the Ark

On a dreary and rainy Sunday morning, we trekked off to the African Safari Wildlife Park. I had been reading about it on the blog of Christi Thomas because this was a favorite pastime for she and her family before she passed away.

There were animals all over the place at this place. It was hilarious in some places, annoying in others. Like when the llama with the really bad underbite was following beside us ... hilarious.

When the herd of buffalo were standing in the middle of the road and we literally had to bump them with the front of our van ... semi-hilarious.

When the buffalo came up and started to bump US with their heads and horns ... not so hilarious.

But the kids had a ball, and we even got to visit Cheese Haven. They had this whole long case of cheese and sausages and whatnot, along with all sorts of samples. The man behind the counter said "this is just 10 percent of what we have. The other 90 percent is behind the cases."

And the Door Man thought he was in Cheese Heaven. He was stuffing (seriously, I would not make this up) cheese and sausages in his pockets and he would reach in from time to time and pull out a tasty little morsel, saying things like "I love cheese" or "this is just in my pockets for later." Because ... you never know when you will ever make it back to Cheese Haven.

Of course, he was calling it Cheese Cutters by the time we got home.

Going on a trek

The Hardware Family is going on Safari.

Ace entered a contest in a local newspaper where hidden words had to be found. The prize was two free tickets to this place. So when he took the entry in, the lady in charge of accepting the entries said "take as many as you need." So we are armed with our carrots, our free tickets, and our map from Mapquest. And we are off.

Playing hookie from church ... I am sure that the Mominator is muttering something under her breath about how SHE has to go to church, so EVERYone should be there, too. Of course, I remember her taking a little trip over to the Hoosier State a few weeks ago during church time.

Will have pictures later. Hopefully we won't get rolled by a buffalo.

Saturday, October 21, 2006

The tooth fairy left me moonshine

Last night, I attended our church's craft night. It is a monthly get together where the women haul out their luggage of scrapbook items, and drag it all into church, only to use about 20 percent of it. Normally I knit, but last night I was on a mission.

And that mission was...

To dispel the truth about the Tooth Fairy.

You see, craft night is normally attended by ADULTS. But somehow, some of these women feel the desperate need to bring their grade school children to these events. Now, mind you, the normal conversations that I have with my friends as my alter ego are not ones that would be brought up at the church craft night. But, I would like to freely discuss the Tooth Fairy, moonshine, and Robin's ex-boyfriend.

Last night, I went ahead with my plan....

and received many looks from across the table as I discussed how the MIL version of the TF decided that it was a good idea to leave the Queen a pack of gum for a tooth. The promotion of tooth decay at its finest, I must say.

And there is a third grader who rarely leaves the company of her mother, standing right next to me. Thankfully, her father had her engaged in a good conversation, and I am most positive that she didn't catch on because I didn't outright say "The Tooth Fairy is a fallacy, and all children need to learn that."

The moonshine and ex-boyfriend conversations ... yeah. Probably not ones to be had at church, either.

Friday, October 20, 2006

Waiting

I can't wait until I start my period.

Wow. I can't wait until I get a chest.

I can't wait until I get my ears pierced.

I can't wait until I turn 16 and get my learner's permit.

I can't wait until I turn 18 and then you can't tell me what to do.

I can't wait to go to college.

I can't wait for summer break to be over so I can get back to partying.

I can't wait until I find a man.

I can't wait until he asks me to marry him.

I can't wait until we get married.

I can't wait until we start having children.

I can't wait a whole nine months to see her face.

I can't wait until this baby is OUT of my body.

I can't wait until she starts smiling.

I can't wait until she starts crawling.

I can't wait until she starts talking.

I can't wait until she starts walking.

I can't wait to have a second child.

I can't wait until she stops getting into things.

I can't wait until she stops the incessant chatter.

I can't wait until she can wipe herself in the bathroom.

I can't wait until this second child is born.

I can't wait until he starts crawling/talking/walking.

I can't wait until these two stop getting everything in my kitchen.

I can't wait until the birth of my third child.

I can't wait until she starts crawling/talking/walking.

I can't wait until they aren't backtalking me.

Wait. Where did my time go? When did my children start to grow up.

I know. I have wished a lot of it away.

Thursday, October 19, 2006

Third Roommate Syndrome

Third wheel.

Third roommate.

Low man on the totem pole.

As a third child, I knew what it was like to play third fiddle to a lot of things my older siblings were doing or had already done. However, there was enough age difference between my brother and my sister and I. There is a total of 11 years between my brother and I, and around six years between Mini Martha and I. So I really never had to live in the shadow of anybody. And, it wasn't like my brother and sister made stellar decisions when they were growing up. I was known as "the good kid," the "princess," the "queen of the castle." So I pretty much grew up as an only child.

My kids, on the other hand, are stair-stepped. And it is funny to watch to see who gravitates to whom. The Door Man and the Monkey are practically best friends, but when they are on each other's last nerve, man watch out.

Then there are times when Queen and the Monkey are sweet sisters. The Queen takes on more of a motherly role, so any real playing that happens is in the sense of big and little sister as opposed to companions playing with one another.

So I see a lot of selection happening, and I expect that. It is only natural.

However, what ISN'T natural is when we receive an invitation to a kids' party and the older two children are invited, but the youngest is not.

We received such an invitation last night from my choir director's wife. They are holding a fall party on the night of our local Halloween parade. On the front of the invite are the two olders' names .. but no Monkey's. I pointed that out to Ace, and he just shrugged his shoulders.

When I saw her that night, I asked for clarification. And her response was a non-committal "well I wasn't sure if she was old enough. I asked the girls (her kids) if they thought she was old enough, and they thought she was."

Well then, if you are listening to your children, how is it that the Monkey's name isn't on the invite?

I will tolerate my kids being selective with who they want to play with when it comes to one another. However, I will not allow an outsider select which of my children attend a KIDS' costume party. That is downright unfair. You get all of them or none of them. Sorry.

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

TT # 15

When I was a little girl, I loved horses. My favorite book of all times was Misty of Chincoteague. I loved to draw pictures of horses. I started riding when I was about nine years old, and I BEGGED my parents for a horse daily. My Mom decided it was time to test the waters, so we leased a horse for a month. Her name was Puffy. She was a pretty good horse, but man was she spunky. Then my Mom found out that a student of hers was selling her horse. It didn't take my Mom long to decide that J.R. was the horse for me. J.R. was my show horse and my companion, so I thought it would be fun to dedicate a TT to him.

Thirteen Things I Loved About J.R.

1. He was a good listener. Never once did he talk back to me.

2. He loved to drink beer and pop. I never had any beer to give him personally, but he was known to drink out of my pop bottle at horse shows.

3. He never let me down. I always knew what kind of mood J.R. was in and I didn't have to walk on egg shells around him.

4. He was always happy to see me. Sure, he knew that seeing me meant he was getting food in the mornings, but there was nothing quite like walking out on a really brisk morning, and walking into that barn and hearing him knickering at me. It was the most precious sound in the world.

5. He had the most amazingly soft nose, and I loved to kiss it constantly. There was one spot right above his nostril that I kissed all the time. I would just stand there and rub my lips on it.

6. He had the deepest brown eyes. I could look into those eyes and tell that he was listening to me.

7. He loved it when I would blow into his nose. He would just stand completely still, and then start leaning into me as if hypnotized.

8. No matter how many times I would kick him with a spur in a horse show class, he forgave me. Every. Single. Time.

9. He had this knack of pooping in the trailer as soon as we loaded him up for a horse show. It didn't matter if he had pooped in his stall two seconds before-hand. He always had something left in him to squeeze out.

10. He brought my Dad and I closer together during a time when most fathers and daughters drift away from one another. Dad and I would load up on Saturdays and go off to the shows. Dad LOVED to watch me show, and he would stand on the rail and encourage me all the time. He was also known to say a cross word or two to J.R.

11. I loved his name... J.R. He was named that for being the smallest horse in the barn. But he didn't stay that way.

12. I loved his height. He was 16.1 hands, and that was pretty big for a Quarter Horse. And he was just big. I just loved him, and so did the judges. He would capture the attention of many.

13. He would take off on our German exchange student and run out into a field of newly-sprouted winter wheat and just start grabbing at it and eating it. Our exchange student didn't share the same love that I did.

WW # 2 - Pedicure, Preschool Style

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

Two ducks

In this house, there are two ducks that have capitivated the attention of my preschooler.

The first is this duck. Ming Ming Duckling from The Wonder Pets, to be exact.

The Monkey is behind me now, correcting her father that this is Ming Ming, NOT Linny the guinea pig.

She can recite every word from the Save the Elephant episode. Thank goodness for the videos on Nick, Jr. because that is how this mother takes showers every day.

And Ming Ming is her absolute favorite of all times.

The second is a gosh-forsaken duck (probably a chicken ... but cut me some slack; I need a theme) dressed up as a pumpkin that plays first the Death March (yes, the DEATH MARCH) and then moves into the Chicken Dance, all the while the thing walks around my house, enthralling and entertaining the Monkey with its ear-splitting loud music.

And guess who gave THAT to the Monkey this weekend? You got it. My mother in law. The toy will more than likely have a terrible accident down the basement stairs. Sometime today.

Monday, October 16, 2006

Sneaking that one in

Ok, Nick Jr. I'm onto ya! I know what you did. You might think you have pulled the wool over the eyes of the toddlers and preschoolers of America, but to this trained ear, I know he isn't the same.

And it sounds like you attempted to replace him with an older child or even a young adult. So what gives?

On a side note ... look what I found when I Googled Backyardigan voices: http://thebackyardigans.blogspot.com/

And yes... I did leave a comment.

Childhood fears

Ok. Bear with me now. My train of thought is on its track, and only I know where it is going. But it will all make sense in the end.

Kailani posted yesterday about the after-effects of the earthquake that hit Hawaii yesterday. I could never imagine the fear and terror that feeling of the earth moving under your feet could bring.

And then I watched this show called "Ultimate Tornado" on the National Geographic Channel last between (between that and Legally Blonde, I was all set). Any time there is a show with tornado in the title, I am sucked into its vortex.

Why the sick fascination?

Because ever since I was a small child, I have had this unshakeable fear of tornados.

I have many tornado dreams. Sometimes I am in a car and dozens of them are touched down around me. I pull into the driveways of houses that appear to have good basements, and plead to the home owners to allow me to come in. And they always do. I am never turned away.

Then there are the dreams when I am in a large warehouse-type building that keeps going down and down. Every level appears to be the best level to be at, but something presents itself that it isn't the best choice, such as a walk-out area that exposes the whole floor, or a complete set of windows that could blow out if struck.

Sometimes when I am safe in my shelter, we do get struck. And I have never, in real life, ever witnessed a tornado.

So ... deep-rooted childhood fear, or just a freaky set of dreams that have absolutely nothing to do with tornados?

See...natural disaster theme did run through it... just in a convulated way.

Sunday, October 15, 2006

Poof.... and it's gone, and a ball of yarn

I deleted a post. Yes. I did. Sorry. But it really wasn't that interesting. At least, I don't think Ace would think it was interesting enough for me to leave it out there in the blogosphere. So poof! It is in deletion land.

So let me talk about this:

Our pastor was talking this morning about engaging the congregation in the numerous ministry opportunities that are available at our church. It was a good, five-part series, talking about equipping, enganging, evangelizing, exalting, and then one more "e" word that escapes me right now. I listened. I really did.

In his discussion, he raised a point about the whole church being bound together. Our worship arts pastor (my choir director) had us throw balls of yarn around so everyone could be holding on to a piece of the yarn. It was a good way to show the interconnection of the church.

But do you know what I was sitting there thinking about?

I wonder if they are going to ball this yarn back up?
This has to be acrylic yarn. It isn't the best quality.
I wonder if I could make a good hat out of this?
I'm not too hip on this color, though.

And you know what? My friends were looking at me during this exercise, and they KNEW I was having these thoughts.

Man. Am I THAT transparent?

I guess I am.

Friday, October 13, 2006

Jacque Blue

I was sitting here working, thinking about a phone conversation I had with my dear friend, Jacque this morning. We will just pick up the phone and call for no reason, or to call and gripe about something that isn't going right in our lives.

I just realized that J and I have talked on the phone almost every day of this week and last, and you know what? I Jones for her conversations.

We can sit on the phone for an hour and have a conversation that, if a third party were forced to listen in, they would call our respective drs. and get some heavy adult ADHD meds prescribed to us ASAP. Seriously, her train of thought and mine are just about one in the same.

Jacque hails from the Bluegrass State, and I can pretty much understand everything she is saying to me, except for one time when she asked me what Sean's wife's name was on Nip/Tuck and I replied with MacNamara. Well, that is his LAST name. That is what I thought J asked me ... but other than that, because I am married into a family of Southerners, I don't have to ask her too many times to repeat herself. Not that her accent is bad. It isn't. But it sure is there, and I love that about her.

She and I have similar issues with a lot of things. And she just makes you feel validated. She shares so much of herself, and she would do anything in the world for anyone. She is a giving, loving individual, and I count myself lucky to be her friend.

So Miss Jacque ... you have yourself a good weekend. And don't you call me tonight at 9. :)

The wheels on the bus

This morning, the Door Man is going on a field trip. It is 30 flipping degrees outside, and they are going to a farm/pumpkin patch. 40 miles away. There are perfectly WONDERFUL pumpkin patches in the near vicinity, and I do not understand why they have to take them to this one.

I have had about 3 panic attacks already because (1) the Door Man is prone to car sickness and (2) no one can take as good of care of my child as me. Oh and the bus careening off the road at 75 miles an hour also has etched itself permanently in my brain.

Did I ever mention that I am a control freak?

My mother and sister have suggested that I keep him home. But he is SO looking forward to this, and there comes a point in time when I just have to let the chips fall where they may.

But really ... WHY it has to be THIS farm I just don't know.

So now I need to go be productive, and pretend that I am not bothered by having to send my six year old off on a bus this morning with Drammamine in his tummy, and hope for the best. His teacher better remember to give him his dose on the way home, or there will be a price to pay!

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

TT # 14

Raising Arizona has been playing on one of the movie channels. This is one of those movies where, no matter how many times you watch it, you catch more and more of the lines. This movie, Fargo, and O Brother, Where Art Thou are movies that I love to watch over and over again, listening for something new. And yes... a theme runneth through them. They are all Coen Brothers films.

Here are....

13 Lines from Raising Arizona

1. H.I., you're young and you got your health, what you want with a job?

2. They've got a name for people like you H.I. That name is called "recidivism."

Repeat offender!

Not a pretty name, is it H.I.?

No sir. That is one bonehead name. But that ain't me anymore.

3. Da**it, are you boys gonna chase down your leads or are you gonna sit drinkin' coffee in the one house in the state where I know my boy ain't at?

4. Name's Smalls. Leonard Smalls. My friends call me Lenny... only I ain't got no friends.

5. Wake up, Son. I'll be taking these Huggies and whatever cash ya got. And make it quick, I'm in dutch with the wife.

6. Biology and the prejudices of others conspired to keep us childless.

7. There's right and there's right and never the t'wain shall meet.

8. Why do you say you feel "trapped" in a man's body?

Well, sometimes I get them menstrual cramps real hard.

9. Edwina's insides were a rocky place where my seed could find no purchase.

10. We figured there was too much happiness here for just the two of us, so we figured the next logical step was to have us a critter.

11. Now you take that diaper off your head and you put it back on your sister!

12. We finally go out with decent people and you break his nose. That ain't too funny, Hi.

His kids seemed to think it was funny.

Well they're just kids.

13. If not Arizona, then a land not too far away. Where all parents are strong and wise and capable. And all children are happy and beloved. I don't know. Maybe it was Utah.

Wordless Wednesday # 1 - Water, Hillbilly Style

Ok. It isn't too wordless. But here's the story.

This is a water tower in Florence, KY. It sits right on I75. Florence is right across the river from Cinci, OH. This particular water tower sits close to their mall.

When I was growing up, we took trips to central Tennessee every year. On our way, we passed through Florence. I would read this water tower every single time, not understanding what yall meant. When I grew a little older, I thought that the people in Florence were total morons because they didn't know how to spell Mall correctly.

It wasn't until I was a junior in college at the University of Kentucky did it finally dawn on me what the word really was.

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

Popularity and Daily Affirmations

Kailani's post at The Pink Diary made me think. Go on over and see what she has to say, but I am also going to break off from her conversation and post my thoughts.

Popularity. Do you still seek it?

Isn't there popularity in the blog world? People who come to my mind are Susie Sunshine, Lucinda from Suburban Turmoil, Amalah, Jen Lancaster, MommaK.... the list could go on and on for me. These are blogs that I view to be on the "A" list.

Do I seek that popularity? Well, to be honest. Sure. What blogger doesn't love to come back to his or her blog to see that s/he has 150 comments on a post? I know I could never achieve that status. Does that bother me? Nah.

I love this little niche of readers that I have. I have met people I wouldn't have met IRL. There is Sue from Great Lakes State of Mind. There is Kelly from Pass the Torch. There is Bellezza from Dolce Bellezza. There are a few others ... and I love to read your comments. I love to know that SOMEone is checking my blog, no matter how paltry it may be at times.

Is this is plea for more readership? Heck no. It is my way of saying thanks to my readers, and a way for me to say I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and, doggonit, people like me!

Monday, October 09, 2006

Nicknames: The Door Man Edition

My friend, Robin, said I should clue you all in on the nicknames that I have used, specifically the Door Man's.

His is really obvious, if you know him IRL. He is OBSESSED with doors. It has abated for a while, but we were able to catch glimpses of the Door Man over the weekend at my brother's camper. DM stood at the camper door, opening and shutting it, going into the bathroom, running around the camper, only to return to that door.

When he was little, that was all he would do. We would always joke that we were going to give him a fake door in the hallway, just so he could open and shut it to his heart's desire.

And of course, his actions have now hurled him into the potential career of being a hotel or ritzy apartment door man.

But the height of DM's career was when we were at Robin's house for a parade. And all DM would do was open all the doors he could find, including the refrigerator.

He still does it today, of course. He loves to open the door to the Chandelier Monkey's preschool. But the best is when he jumps out of his seat in the van, slams his door shut, and comes running around to my door, and opens it for his Mommy.

That is not an obsession. That is chivalry.

A shout out to my new renter

Sorry it has taken me a few days to shout out to my new renter, A Yoga Coffee Outlook! She is a YouTube junkie (I am a little, too!), and she is giving away an Ipod Nano!

Welcome!!!!! Hope you enjoy your stay!

Technologically challenged

Yesterday, I was on Front Line Vocals in church. We started using headsets, so think Brittney Spears in church. Singing church songs, of course. And in choir robes. And no slutty dancing. Ok. Don't think Brittney Spears.

Anyway, there are three of us who are miked, and Wednesday night was the first time we used them. It was a go for yesterday morning.

Imagine my surprise when the sound man came to me in the lobby at the end of the first service, telling me that I needed to turn my mike on. I told him that I thought I had. He said "no, you turned yourself off."

Ok. Cool.

Then I started thinking.

I had that mike on the WHOLE time I was up there, except for when I should have had it on.

Including the rehearsal time when I was complaining about not feeling too "spiritual" that morning to a friend of mine.

Including the time when I was back in the back of the church talking to our senior pastor about how I looked like a diva with the headset on.

Including the time when I was bi*&#ing to the same said friend about the fact that I didn't get a solo part, and that he gave it to someone else. And there were some snarky comments made.

Including the time that I went into the choir room, took off my robe, and started walking down the hallway, complaining that my feet hurt.

However, I do believe that the sound man was smart enough and picked up the fact that I was having some technical difficulties.

But really... how hard can up for on and down for off be.

Obviously I was more worried about gossiping in church than learning the curve.

Lesson learned.

Sunday, October 08, 2006

Where in the BLEEP did my weekend go?

The last thing I knew, it was Friday night and I was at a Stampin' Up party, fretting over whether I still had a job.

Here it is, Sunday night, party is over, I still have a job, and I want to know where my weekend went?

Oh yeah. It went to that thing I was fretting over on Friday night.

Saturday, October 07, 2006

The Pink Diary's Statistics

Well, she is gone. It was fun having her.

And here are the stats:

1041 hits
499 unique hits
38 clicks
19 unique clicks

So the blog is up for rent again.

Friday, October 06, 2006

Only 13 more hours

No. Not until BG. That is T minus 3 hours and counting, babies.

This is the time my renter has left on my blog. Kailani will be leaving me tomorrow morning around 7 EST, so get your clicks in now! She has a kick-arse review on GA. Robin, you should go read this. She is a huge GA fan.

So go spread the love to Kailani.

Thursday, October 05, 2006

In 24 hours

I will have wet myself with excitement because Battlestar Galactica starts tomorrow night.

Oh sweetness.

Yes. I'm a geek. But you all just remember how you get about Lost.

And Jacque. I know I committed a cardinal sin on Wednesday night. Don't return the favor tomorrow night.

Ace has forwarded some website that screams "I'm a geek so I am going to download and listen to the theme song about 20 times tonight." But it is a KICKING theme song.

TT # 13

WOW! 13 Thursday 13s! And I feel bad that I haven't come up with some really witty list of 13 things. Oh well.

I am an auditory person. There are songs that will come on the radio or my iRiver, and I will immediately think of a person or a place in my life, thinking of all the good memories (or bad).

So here is my list of:

13 Songs That Hold Memories for Me

1. Unchained Melody. This is "our" song. Ace took me to see Ghost when we first started dating, and I fell in love with this song, and fell in love with Ace at the same time.

2. Dreams by The Cranberries. I used to play this song when Queen Bee was a tiny little baby, remembering my mother telling me that she used to dance with us to music. So whenever this song plays, I immediately think of that sweet little baby, falling asleep on my shoulder as we danced around the living room of our first house.

3. 316 A Guitar Solo by Eddie Van Halen. This also reminds me of Ace. Ace is a lover of all things Van Halen, especially Eddie. He always loved his little guitar solos they would throw on an album, and it takes me back to a time in college when there were no worries other than not having anything to do on Friday night.

4. Cathedral Another Guitar Solo by Eddie. Same stuff as number 3.

5. Godspeed. This song reminds me of the Door Man and the Monkey. I sing this song to Monkey before she goes to bed, and I discovered the song when the Man was a little guy. I just loved the lyrics.

6. Shepherd Moons by Enya. This is a whole album, I know. But my roommate at Cedar Point loved to play Enya's music to go to sleep, and at that point in my life, I had never even heard of her. After that, I was an addict to her music.

7. Should've Been by Tiffany. I think that is the song ... you know... The Flowers You Gave Me Are Just About to Die. This song reminds me of when my ex ex boyfriend broke up with me when I was a senior in high school. I remember going off to All County Choir tryouts, crying my eyes out and this song came on. I had to literally PULL OVER to sing this song and sob. Yeah. Young love. Now that ex ex has been charged with conspiracy to commit tax fraud. Good times.

8. Come on Eileen. This song just reminds me of all things 80s. It is a great summation of all those feelings and times I had as a child of the 80s.

9. Tubthumping by Chumba Wumba. I Get Knocked Down But I Get Up Again. This song, of all things, reminds me of when I worked part-time at The Disney Store and I was newly pregnant with the Queen. I would have to run to the bathroom and get sick because I had morning sickness the moment I knew she was in my body. We always had the radio on after work when we were cleaning up, and we always called in and requested the station to play it.

10. Comfortably Numb by Pink Floyd. I went to a smaller community college that was about 4 hours from where I lived for the first two years of college. My sophomore year, there was a really bad car accident that involved four upperclassmen. Three of them were killed. We had a memorial dedication to them, and I remember this song blaring from one of the dorm rooms.

11. Rocket Man by Elton John. When the Door Man was the tender age of one, he started having seizures. They were different; not the typical petit mal or grand mal that you would think. They were so subtle that it was hard to get them on a regular EEg. So we had to have a 24-hour ambulatory EEg done. He was strapped up to this computer equipment, and he looked like a little astronaut walking around this house. It broke my heart, and then Rocket Man came on the radio and all I could think of was how he looked like an astronaut getting ready to take off for the moon.

12. Beth by Kiss. This song reminds me of my Sissy, Mini Martha. She used to play this ALL the time because, well, it is a short version of her name. And I just remember that song being etched into my brain.

13. Somewhere Over the Rainbow by Israel Kamakawiwo Ole'. This is that one that you hear started on a lot of commercials with the ukelele. I just LOVE this song. They play it for Rice Krispie commercials now, but it used to be played for some other commercial, and I fell in love with it. The commercial was on during the time that the Queen was a babe, and it reminds me of her every time I hear it.

Wednesday, October 04, 2006

Unce, Tice, Free Hundred Times a Mady

Ok... name it. You know you have heard it.

But really, this is in reference to how many times can I REALLY check my email in a day. I think I am nearing the 300 mark for the day.

Because I am waiting to hear about a job interview.

And they are dangling me by a string right now.

And I don't like that at all.

I was phone interviewed last week, and I think I made the interviewer question her sanity a few times for agreeing to interview me, of all the people who were being interviewed that night.

I was told that it would take them two weeks to figure out who to give face to face interviews with. And I was informed that I passed the phone interview, but I am in hiatus-land where I was good enough on the phone, but still trying to decide if I am good enough to see face to face.

So here I sit, frantically checking my email like I am some girl sitting by the phone waiting for her dream man to call to ask her to the prom.

I need to get a life. And get over myself. And get up from this chair.

But not before I go check my email again.

And that song ... Eddie Murphy's Buckwheat's Greatest Hits.

Fun with Food

She came back here saying "monster claws" and growling.

Oh the fun a child can have with Bugles.

Tuesday, October 03, 2006

Pass the Torch Tuesday

Last night as I was driving Queen Bee home from her dance lesson, she and I engaged in a conversation about money.

Mommy ... what would it be like if we were millionaires?

Well, nothing would change, really. We would just have more money.

Well you know what? I would give it all to people who don't have any money, because we really don't need all of that money at all. We have a house and a good car, and we have food. A lot of people don't have those things. That is really sad.

If I have said it once, I will say it a billion times more: this child has the heart of a servant.

Monday, October 02, 2006

12:19 am

Dear Queen Bee:

I know you have heard of the moment I found out I was carrying your life in my body.

I know you have heard of the moments after your birth when you weren't breathing on your own, and we didn't hear you cry for 7-8 minutes.

I know you have heard of your first steps taken as you were watching Teletubbies.

I know you have heard how for quite some time, you referred to yourself only by your last name.

I know you have heard all about the first smiles, the first laughs, the first time you slept through the night, and the first tooth.

I know you have heard the stories of how you would love to get a bowl full of fresh snow, and sit on the kitchen floor with a big spoon and eat it.

I know you have heard us tell you countless times how much we love you.

But I don't think you have heard me tell you how much my life was changed at 12:19 in the morning on this date in 1998.

Happy Eighth Birthday, sweet, sweet child.

A Perfect Post - September Style

I happened upon Amalah's blog from a link from another blog. I have visited her before, and the picture of the child, mouth all agape, gives me reason to smile everytime.

On one particular trip, I encountered a post, aptly called 365 Days.

This is a beautiful post that celebrates the past year of her son, Noah's, life. So many times, we look at the milestones that children hit ... when they start walking, when they start saying mama and dada, when they sleep through the night. Amalah takes a look at the little boy his is now, and wonders about the man he is yet to come.

That is why I decided to award Amalah the September Perfect Post Award.

Check out the other Perfect Post awardees at Suburban Turmoil and Petroville.

Sunday, October 01, 2006

Open mouth, insert soccer cleat

I like to infiltrate enemy lines, and set up my chair in the opposing soccer team's den of mother bears. And then I sit. And listen. I don't do or say much to give myself away. I know they know I am not one of "them," but they don't know who I belong to. So it makes for a good hour's worth of entertainment.

This afternoon, the Queen played a team they had played once before, and I was not in attendance at that game. The opposing team consisted of a few of her friends from her class, so it is always interesting to see that dynamic in play. But the girls pretty much play, oblivious to one another when in the heat of the moment.

The mothers, on the other hand, are oblivious to nothing.

Go Brianna! Go Benji! Go Morgan and Maggie and Jules and Sarah! Go go go go!

Doesn't matter if none of those children belong to that mother. They just yell. At everyone on the team. I wonder if it is their own stealth tactic, knowing that there is an enemy amongst them.

But, sooner or later, I figure out who is whose child when they start bribing them with a $ 5 bill if they score a goal.

Me, I yell at my kid. Not a lot. I just give her a few pointers here and there, but only when I am right beside her. And not "ok ... now go over and stand and .... OOOOO don't kick the ball THAT way. Kick it THIS way." I say things like "you can play that whole area there when you are on halfback." Or "oooo.. don't touch the ball out there."

I figured that these mothers had figured out that I was for the other team. But apparently this one hadn't figured it out yet, or she thought she was being sneaky in her comment, thinking I couldn't hear a word she was saying.

Wrong. So wrong.

Word for word:

Maybe the reason the other team is scoring all of the goals and our's aren't is because we don't have a loud, obnoxious coach yelling at them and intimidating them all the time to score those goals.

Now. It took EVERY ounce of my self-restraint to not shoot a retort directly back at her.

So I called Ace instead.

Word for word:

Ok ... get this. You wouldn't BELIEVE what I just heard (repeats comment).

Are you SERIOUS? Does she know you heard you?

(in my most loud and carrying voice) Well how couldn't she know I heard her. I am sitting two people away from her.

From the mouth of that mother came only good comments afterwards.

And lady .... that isn't the coach who is scoring the goals. It is a better team than your kid's. And THAT, my friend, is called sour grapes.

I'm a mom of three peeps ... Queen Bee, The Door Man, and the Chandelier Monkey, and wife to Ace, the Helpful Hardware Man. I created this space to get away from the people known as my inlaws, and because life with three kids and a hubby is all Unexplored Territory.

The nine-year-old who seems to be growing older every minute, has an opinion and a comment for everything, and has a true servant's heart.

The seven-year-old who loves the organization of things, will someday be someone's therapist because of his kind soul, and will more than likely be living with us until he is 40 years old.

The five-year-old with the 13-year-old attitude, who has a dictator's personality, asks you to watch her all the time and say "hold on" to keep your attention, and will someday come home on the back of some dude's motorcycle with 10 tatts and a body piercing or two.

The man of the house, the fixer of things, the winner of prizes, and the only person in his family to escape the South.